Dear George,
My name is Marti and I think I’m a gorgeous cat! I LOVE glamour! I love to be pampered and cared for.
I love “fame & glory”. I love sleeping on my human’s chest!
Hope no one will find this weird.
I’m a rescue from a local shelter. I was rescued by my human along with other two cats but, I’m the only one loving glamour. I’m the only one loving caviar and a sniff of champagne! I love shaggy covers
But I don’t think my human understands this. The other day I tried to shred my cover (see picture) into a “fluffier” one. It was taken as a bad thing.
George, only you, as a human behavior specialist can tell me how can I razzle-dazzle my human?
In awe
Marti
Dear Marti,
Wow. Champagne, caviar, you really do do the luxury life. You surely razzle dazzle me - and you are the right colour too. We black cats should stick together. I am a cat who is into huntin', rattin', and rabbitin' (sorry Harve), and if it wasn't for that I would ask you to come over some time - snip, or not!Shredding. We all do it. We all love it. Personally I think Celia's curtains look all the better for their frilly ends. This very day she lunched with a fashionista who was wearing a shawl full of shredded bits. Just like the effect that I put the bed valance so successfully, when I wake her up with a well timed morning scratch.
I have to admit that the business of beautifully shredded furniture is something that we cats find instinctively and artistically satisfying. But I don't think any of us, no matter how good we are at communicating with humans, this simple minded species, has ever been able to explain the sheer beauty of it - the almost musical sound of the material tearing, and the aesthetically pleasing movement of the graceful downward strop, followed by the sheer exaggerated fluffiness of the resulting fabric. Wonderfully pleasing to the feline ear, paw and eye.
But they don't get it, Marti. They just don't understand it at all. Sometimes I think that they don't really have artistic natures. They are blind to beauty, impervious to scent, unable to distinguish the subtleties of body language, the minute alterations of the tail that mean so much...
I have also been unable to persuade Celia to pay attention to the zen patterns I draw on the litter inside the litter tray. I did a beautiful Japanese garden effect this morning. What did she do? Just scooped it out. But I love the stupid species. Somehow the sheer pathos of their limited abilities makes me fond of them.
Love
George
P. S. I haven't really answered your question on how to razzle dazzle humans, I suppose. Just be yourself, Marti. You are so purrrrfectly beautiful.
Oh, Marti! We (Cayenne & I) are into caviar and champagne too.....but only on special occasions!
ReplyDeleteI prefer champagne over caviar thou :-)))
I'm into shredding too! Yesterday....I had to put up with an area rug. I thought it wasn't fluffier enough! I did a pretty good job (of course, none of my human pets understood my sur-realistic art)
Love
Fluffy
Shredding curtains....such a beautiful dream!
ReplyDeleteGuess....my human have nothing that can be shredded in the house. At least, I didn't find anything.
Diego
Indeed you are beautiful Marti!
ReplyDeleteDid you tried shredding human clothing?
You might find it more satisfying! Surprise your human with those little holes in the sweater :-)
Hugs,
Cayenne
Nah! I'm more into hunting and rabbiting (sorry Harve). Too bad my female human absolutely loves the little rabbit that comes into my garden and eats all tulips. I would love to go after him...but she's keeping me inside each time the rabbit is in my garden. Just an example of human poor judgement!
ReplyDeleteMinnie
Marti, you are the poster cat for glamour. George is right, apes have no aesthetic sense at all. There's a technique that cats can use to help apes lose their fear of shredded items - it's called "flooding" - it requires that you shred everything made of fabric, wood, paper and card in your home. This will upset the apes for a while, but they will get used to it as they see how it improves their environment and makes you happy. Then you can concentrate on dazzling them with your beauty.
ReplyDeleteWhicky Wuudler
Shredding for his country ;)
Marti you are a beauty! I had a beautiful black cat, Tar Baby, many years ago. She was a funny little kitty. My beloved Oscar never did shred anything, but he did go after the baby rabbits. I think the babies will have a good chance of growing up this year with him gone. I would always rescue any baby rabbit he caught when he brought them around or in the house.
ReplyDelete