Saturday, March 25, 2023

Cat shows.... yawn!


Cat shows... yawn. Boring, boring, boring. 

With their usual ability to discover the obvious, human scientists have confirmed this, after hours spent timing our movements.

Most of the time we show cats just sleep. We might look at those who are staring at us some of the time. Only when it gets too busy and crowded do some of us hide in the litter tray.

Why don't we react with more stress? After all, it's well known to most humans (or should be) that staring freaks us out.* We stare to intimidate other cats and we feel stressed when they stare at us. We don't like being stared at.

The truth is that we show cats are just used to this. Most of the time we have a good life in a house with humans that adore us. But about once a month, we are put in a carrier and have to spend a day sitting in a small cage in a cat show.

Oh well, it could be worse...

*Learn about our feelings by reading  Being Your Cat. Get it here.


Friday, March 17, 2023

The cat-human sleeping partnership.


Do we help humans sleep? This question has now been investigated by scientists who declare that we don't. Having a cat on the bed is more likely to give a human jerking legs.

But, of course, it is the wrong question....

The correct way to look at the feline-human sleep partnership is to ask whether humans help us sleep. And the answer is clear - yes, they do. Here are the reasons why:

  • A human body acts like a large hot water bottle, giving off useful warmth to the feline body.
  • When their limbs are arranged in the correct position, they can keep drafts away from the sleeping feline.
  • They are easily trained to move, while sleeping, so that we have more space, when we need to stretch out.

What can a cat do for a better night's sleep? Here are some suggestions.

  • If there are two humans in the bed, sleep between them to minimize drafts or unwanted human activity. Cats are a natural contraceptive.
  • The single human should be encouraged to curl round the sleeping feline body, reducing drafts that way.
  • Wake up snoring humans at regular intervals. there is usually a period of time before heavy snoring reoccurs.

Saturday, March 11, 2023

Why humans blame us cats.

Do not trust humans completely. Because they are a species that will turn on cats, when they are frightened.

Fear makes them panic. Panic makes them non-rational. We cats in the UK were lucky to avoid mass slaughter during the start of the Covid epidemic. The authorities considered killing all cats. 

Mad idea? Yes, but humans will always blame other species. This year, the Chinese authorities have killed 2000 pet hamsters, blaming them for spreading the epidemic.

Luckily for Chinese cats, it was the hamsters got the blame. But humans often blame cats. During the Great Plague of 1666 in London, the Lord Mayor ordered all cats and dogs to be killed. A total of 100,000 cats and 40,000 dogs were slaughtered, according to Daniel Defoe.

Just the wrong thing to do. Because the plague was being spread by fleas that lived on rats. Fewer cats meant more rats 

But that is the human response. Unthinking. Lacking rational thought. Always ready to blame somebody else.

Friday, March 03, 2023

I am an unacknowledged genius


She's done it again. I am an acknowledged author of only one book, A Cat's Guide to Humans, but I have co-authored many more cat books with my human, Celia.

I co-author because my paws get tired when I am typing all day on the keyboard. And, if I sit down on it, as I often do for a rest, the type somehow goes all wrong.

So co-authoring with a human has its obvious benefits. But the major drawback is the complete lack of acknowledgement. And she'd done it again. Left my name off the book, Being Your Cat.

The insights are mine. The ideas are mine. She couldn't have written it without me. 

Yet she thinks it's acceptable to leave out my name altogether. I am not on the cover. I am not on the dedication. I am not in the Endnotes. I am not even in the thanks-acknowedgements at the end of the book.

It is not good enough.

I am planning revenge. Shall I pee on one of the books? Or give her a sharp nip? Or just ignore her for a few days....

Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online