Dear George,
Now I truly understand about the international banking collapse that is wrecking the world economy.... it's come home to my food bowl. I overheard my humans discussing how they could cut back and they suggested buying cheaper cat food. Cheaper cat food? Can you believe it? I mean, I know times are bad. She hasn't bought a pair of shoes for three months. But I never thought it would get that bad. Lehman Brothers, Northern Rock, Bradford and Bingley and now my little portion of Sheba. Any suggestions?
Jim
Dear Jim,
You will have to put in a self-help recovery plan. We cats can't rely on the UK's Prime Minister Gordon Brown or even the USA's Barrack Obama. Gordon Brown seems to have even less feline than financial expertise (he seems to have a thing against 'fat cats') and Barrack Obama is getting a dog. Admittedly he is rescuing a dog, but for all that it's a dog not a cat.
First, you need to put in place an alternative supply food programme. What does this mean? It means a covert place where you can eat your fill without your humans knowing. If you have access to a cat flap, take a walk down the road and beatle into any other cat flaps that you find. Eat the cat food put down for other cats. Or, keep an eye out for a sympathetic human, and sit at their back door. If they let you in, eat a few crumbs of dry bread from the kitchen floor or under from the bird feeder. This will convince them that you are hungry and with luck they will give you something to eat.
Once you have this part of the food programme in place, stop eating the cheap food which is put down for you. Just say no. Go up to it, look at it, look up at your human with a pained and sorrowful expression, then slowly and sadly walk away. Here is where sheer acting ability comes in. Pile it on thick, particularly that upward look of a starving cat! If you can, eat a few crumbs of dry bread that have fallen to the kitchen floor. Walk away with a slight totter, as if weak from lack of food.
This'll slay them, I promise you. If you can keep it up for a week, they will give in. Humans underestimate feline persistence.
George
PS. Please - help with tips for ensuring good food.
Or...try the trick my cousin, Minnie, tried this past weekend!
ReplyDeletePretend you go for a "walk", spend sometime in the backyard and catch that little mouse who is as "hungry" as you are. Wait for your humans to be busy and sneak back in the house. Hide the mouse in a place where it is "safe" and away from humans eyes.
Minnie was in a hurry and hid the mouse in the laundry room! Big mistake; her female housekeeper spends lots of time in there (we never understood why). So, she found the mouse (we really think she can smell mice)and since it was still alive (another of Minnie's mistake), she "set it" free in the nearby ravine. See....that's how economy goes down the drain! Minnie was really upset about losing her "food deposit"! But...it was a learning experience; I told her so many time to not trust humans!
Jim, now you know "how to and how not to", so I wish you luck.
Hugs
Cayenne
Hey, I just checked the cupboard and I don't have to worry; there is plenty of food for me. And, if my sister goes on a diet then I have even more food :-)
ReplyDeleteBut, Jim, what I think you should do, since you cats in UK eat mostly dry food,is making small "favorite food" deposits through the house.
You can carry few kibbles at a time and hide them in places where your humans won't clean too often. Ideal humans don't clean at all, but it's hard to find perfection!
Then....when they try to give you cheap food you can really give them a hard time - make that "unhappy" face and "weak meows" of hunger. Make sure they won't catch you smiling behind their back!
Love
Fluffy
Well, so far my private stock of food is in good shape. I think I overheard my humans are going to make me homemade food that will be better for me.
ReplyDeleteIf I don't like what is being served I just turn me nose up at it and go to the door and ask to go outside. Then I find me a tasty rabbit or mouse. The other morning I caught me a nice big rabbit and my human hear the darn thing squeeling and she came running outside (in her nightgown no less) screaming at me and I dropped my nice rabbit and it started running zig zag back and forth across the yard and MY rabbit GOT AWAY! I was so upset! The weather is warming up here, so I anticipate that my outdoor food supply will be increasing really soon. Then I can be even MORE selective as to what I eat inside.
One more thing, did you hear that the Bush family lost their cat. I understand she was 18 years old. Still very sad. I hope they will get another one and NOT a d.o.g.!
ReplyDelete