Teeth .... I'm afraid of the dentist!

Dear George, 
Please do take a look at my photo (attached) and tell me what do you see?I bet ….you’ll say: “a lazy cat” as everybody else does, but let me tell you that what you see is a “worried cat”. Why I’m worried? I’m worried because my humans decided that I need a “teeth cleaning” and I heard them ….debating anesthesia.  
Well, I don’t like the idea at all; neither teeth cleaning nor anesthesia. What if I’ll never wake up from it? I never heard my grandparents or great-grandparents to have their teeth cleaned. I never heard of any cat brushing its teeth. Are my humans crazy? George, how can I get my teeth cleaned….in a simple and easy way?

SOS - in a haste

Vegas

Dear Vegas,
The easiest way to keep your teeth clean, is to get your human to buy special dental dry food and mix it with your ordinary kibble. Special dental food has larger than normal bits of kibble and crunching each bit of kibble up helps keep teeth clean. Chews and dental treats are delicious too. 
Other possibilities are Vet Aquadent Anti Plaque Solution which can be added to your water, or Logic oral hygeine gel put directly into your mouth. It tastes quite pleasant  Some humans use a toothbrush with special feline toothpaste to clean our teeth but I personally won't stand for this invasion of my mouth. A couple of sharp bites put a stop to Celia trying it on!
I rarely consult my human, as she has nothing much of interest to say. But lately she told me she had spent a total of about 10 hours in the dentist's chair (spread over 3 months) for some complicated dental work. She would have preferred anesthesia so that she didn't have to sit there waiting for the dentist to drill down. So if painkillers or anaesthetic is on offer, embrace them with all four paws!
Believe me, Vegas, drifting off into an anaesthetic sleep is better than being present. And when you wake up, all the nasty stuff will be over.
Yours earnestly
George
PS. If you do have to have anaesthetic, get your humans to ask the vet if anything else needs checking while you are under. It might be a good time to make sure you don't have any arthritis.

Cats, castles, and microchipping - is it safe for me?

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Dear George,
I’m Tomi von Ineu and a wanderer at heart! Like in any aristocratic family, when the parents don’t live together, the father’s family has rights to a kitten. And, since I was the only one willing to leave home ….there I went full speed towards new adventures, my new castle and my new domain Ineu. But, it seems that I misbehaved from the very beginning as I escaped through (or under) the gates of the castle. I heard my little human kitten, sorry, my little princess crying but I didn’t bother thinking that I’ll make up to her later. I got lost. Fortunately, some good human kittens found me and took me back to my castle. As a corrective action …I’m now locked in the tower! Plus, I heard them saying that I’ll be microchipped. God, hope they won’t electrocute me! I send a letter to the Elders in the village to ask what a microchip is. They said my humans will put a GPS in my head so they can track all my moves. George, is that true? Can they put some computer in my head and then watch me on their security cameras/monitors?
Yours
Tomi von Ineu

Dear Tomi

I am so impressed by your status.  Your own castle. And locked in a tower, just like Rappunzel in the fairy tale. She escaped and so will you, once you have that microchip. I promise you, microchips are safe. I have one. It's to help if we get lost. Ordinary microchips just stay in the body, and if someone finds us when we are lost, they can get a vet or a rescue charity to scan us, read the microchip, and find our owner.
There are GPS devices for cats but these have to be mounted on a collar. Here in the UK most catflap cats don't wear a collar, because of worries about safety (for a discussion of this, go here) GPS collars may present difficulties for some of us smaller cats, as they add a bit of weight - though there are very light ones used for tracking small rodents. GPS microchips are on the way (a patent has been filed) but I am not sure how far they are widely available. These would be a small implant not requiring a collar.
Most of us cats get a microchip when we are neutered and spayed, so it is no big deal. Don't worry Tomi, a microchip is a very good thing to have.
Yours reassuringly
George

The big career decision - free as a feral or adopting a human.

Dear George,
I am facing a big decision. Shall I adopt a human or just live a human-free life? I was born in a factory with three brothers and sisters. Our mother vanished and we were taken into care by Sunshine Cat Rescue. The other three were neutered and spayed and will probably go on to lead a life free of humans. I was too ill.
You know what happened next, George, as I am living in a room in the house belonging to Tilly and Toby. Celia is trying to purrsuade me that my future is to adopt a human. She has been feeding me by hand, slowly accustoming me to her touch and, really, I quite like her. If I could adopt her, I probably would. 
You can see my experience on YouTube here. There are videos showing my progress in the new life. At first I couldn't stop hissing and hiding from her: now I have got used to her.
But as you know, Toby is bored with me and Tilly is sheer plumb disgusted. So if I choose a career as a pet, I will have to adopt a new human. I have been spayed, so if I live as a feral cat I shall not be worn out with kitten bearing. It's difficult to decide. What are the pros and cons, George.
Yours undecided,
Abby the Tabby.

Dear Abby,
It's a no brainer.  You adopt a human and you get free catfood for life, excellent medical care, and a devoted servant. There is central heating all the time, a very large bed (which admittedly you will have to share with your human), and if you are lucky a cat flap. So you won't have to give up hunting and you will have many happy hours training your human.
Of course, there is a downside. You won't have a sex life, but that would be true for you even if you did decide on the free feral life. Life with a human can be boring, but that is only if you don't have the imagination to make them more active. Agility training for humans, purrsuading them to play games with you, is good for mental and physical health, both for you and for your pet.
So that is the way you should go. That was my career choice and I have never regretted it.
Yours solemnly
George.

I'm learning to trust humans - but worried about a feline bully

Dear George,

I’m a rescue and, of course I live in a multiple cat house. I’m the only girl and very shy.
I’ve always been very shy and not very trustful, especially of humans. One of my “brothers” is a bully and I don’t know how to deal with that. My humans are very supportive of me but they work late hours. Lately I started going to them for an occasional rubbing and petting and they seemed to be very happy. Yesterday, after quite few hours of playing time with them I heard them saying “she’s coming out of her shell”. I got nervous as I don’t know what that means? Am I going to lose my coat? What shell are they talking about?

Nervously

Princess Penelope

Dear Princess Penelope,
Feline bullies are difficult to deal with. Do you have your own safe sleeping area, where he cannot intrude upon you? Doe he block your way to the litter tray? Or have your humans got several trays so that you can always get to one without anxiety? The same with food. You should not have to eat in close proximity to him. There should be several food and water locations. 
I am so glad that you are beginning to trust your humans. I hope that you are able to spend some time with them, without the bully being there to intimidate you by staring or blocking. You should train them to feed you cat treats when you go towards them, so that you are getting rewarded for overcoming your fear. Patient humans will be rewarded by your love.
Yours sympathetically
George
PS.  Celia has taken to taming a feral kitten instead of concentrating her time on serving me. I am fed up. You can see it here.

Keeping time - feline time, not human time.

Dear George,

We are the ultimate Time Keepers as you can see in the photo attached.

Marty is the keeper of the “Sleeping Time” and I, Vegas, am the keeper of the “Feeding Time”. However, our humans seem to function in a different time zone. They try to introduce to us a “working time” (whatever is that), a “work-out time” (such a joke – we look at them in amazement when they act like hamsters running on a wheel they call treadmill) and something they call “socializing time” (when they eat and drink and make loud noises). Why? Why do they try to make life complicated? Why can’t they function on our time? George, how do we train them?

From Sleeping and Eating zone time

Marty and Vegas

Dear Marty and Vegas,
Many cats manage to re-educate their humans into feline time but it does take a great deal of time, effort and purrsistence. Easiest place to start is the awful socialising time.
 If a supper party has gone on too long, I walk into the room and start miaowing.  If they are round the table I jump on to the table and try to eat any food that may be there. Or turn and put my bottom in the nearest human face - this rarely fails to create a sensation. It always embarasses Celia, who has to get up from her chair and remove me.
If they are lingering in the living room, drinking too much of that liquid catnip which they use, I can't use the same tactics. Instead, I look round the human that seems uneasy with my presence, who may not like cats, and I leap on to her lap, rubbing against her and purring loudly. Alternatively look for the human who is slightly allergic to cat fur - signs are a very red face and lots of sneezing or wheezing. Do the same to them.
You can also decide to rub on the glasses, thus upsetting them and pouring liquid everywhere. If this is the red catnip liquor, it will make a big stain on the furniture and carpet. Celia then has to rush off and start trying to clean it up. Result - supper party interrupted. Guests think of leaving.
Have a go.
Love George.

Will a feline amputee be happy again?

Dear George,

I’m writing on behalf of your blog follower and our friend, Freddy who needs some tips.

Freddy lost one of his front legs to an aggressive bone cancer. His leg was amputated (from his shoulder) last week in an attempt to save his life as the cancer didn’t spread.

He’s doing fine now, is under medication and pain killers – he even jumped on the sofa. However, his mommy is very worried about Freddy. She can use any tip and advice available. Please help her to cope with the situation at this difficult time in their life.

Thanks & love

Fluffy

Dear Fluffy,

Of course Freddy's human is worried. She has only two legs and if one of hers was cut off, she couldn't get around at all. But we cats are superior legwise! We have four, double the human number, so if we lose one, we can manage perfectly well because we have still have three.

Yes, it takes a little time to get our balance. But we are superior to humans in that too. We have a tail.  We can balance our bodies by moving that wonderful extra wavy limb. There's some very helpful information for humans about living with a feline amputee here. 
Last week, Paco was reporting his disappointment with humans. Well, here is an example of a good human. She really has done her best for Freddy. I just wish that all humans were as loving as she is. 
Tell Freddy from me get going on his three legs. Purr a lot to calm down your human.
We Cats Can Do It. 
Cheers,
George.
PS. For people with disabled cats, there might be some useful information on Celia's website about disabled animals.

Of man..... and disappointments.

Dear George, 

Your post last week made me ponder on life in general and, in particular on our lives with humans. Why humans, especially the ones closest to us, hurt and disappoint us so much and all in the name of friendship or love? I agree with Fluffy that just “domesticating them” was not enough. We failed in our training as they never developed a higher conscience or integrity. They constantly sneak behind our back and do things making us look like fools. Don’t they see it? Pondering on human behaviour I’ll quote Carl Jung who said: “I had always been impressed by the fact that there are a surprising number of individuals who never use their minds if they can avoid it, and an equal number who do use their minds, but in an amazingly stupid way”. All I can say is…..Jung was right! The stories from last week are a proof.

What should we do? Give up on them?

Very, very sad

Paco

Dear Paco,
I do understand how you feel, Paco. It hits me hard, when I hear of the humans that slaughter lions, do cruel medical experiments on cats, throw elderly cats out on the street to die rather than pay a vet's bill, or let their children tease or even torture cats. Yes, some humans are vile.

But we mustn't give up on them. We must keep the faith and try to change them, one human being at a time. For every vile dentist that slaughters a lion, there is a devoted person helping cats find good homes, or just beautiful human beings like Michelle and Dan who are kept well and happy by Fluffy.
When I despair, I think of the good humans in our lives. They balance out the bad ones. And every cat who lives in a human home can do their bit - by training their human to love and respect felines. They can be trained. Or, at least, most of them can be. Celia was always a natural cat lover but I helped train her partner, Ronnie, to love cats. From being indifferent he became a truly good cat pet.
So it can be done.
Remember. We cannot change them all, but we can change one.
So that is the human we change.
Sympathies
George 
PS. Michelle has asked me to mention a good source of sensible advice for your human pet's health. Look here

Tigers, lions, Whiskas cat food and a disgusting dentist

Dear George,
I know this letter won't be published in time for Global Tiger Day on July 29, but I want to appeal for support from fellow felines. The problem is humans, Homo sapiens.
You little tigers, tabbies and others, have cleverly domesticated them. But, alas, we big cats  cannot do this. We thought about capturing a few, keeping them in captivity to breed, and then killing and eating them, (like humans do with cattle), but somehow our hearts were not in it. We kill to live: we don't live to kill, like some humans.
We tigers are not as deliberately cruel as humans are. We are not dentists after all (read here about the dentist that shot a lion with an arrow making it die slowly over more than 24 hours). We are just wild animals trying to survive alongside humans.
They take our land, shoot us, trap us, snare us, cut up our bodies for Chinese medicine, or stuff our corpses so that dentists can put them on a wall and feel good about themselves. Whiskas cat food are supporting Global Tiger week here.
Yours
Anonymous Tiger cub

Dear Tiger Cub,
We know how desperate our big cat cousins are getting as their number dwindle. Even us small cats, who have learned to survive by domesticating humans and living in their territory, suffer from human cruelty. There are thousands of unwanted stray cats desperate to adopt a loving human.
I was disgused to read about the story of Cecil the lion, killed by a bow and arrow and given a lingering painful death. Just so a pathetic dentist could stuff his head and put it on the wall. Shame on him. Make this revolting death mean something by by getting your human to sign a petition here. Or donate for Cecil the lion here. 
And, please, please, please, if you know any humans who don't have a cat, purrsuade them to adopt, or foster, or give money to unwanted stray cats.
Yours
George.

Animal communication….scam or reality?

Dear George,
I stand here today (in front of a lion ….as you can see in the photo) to debate the animal communication topic. You know very well we can communicate effectively with all species but, humans are not that evolved so, of course, we have a problem communicating with our human pets. Take my example: we are a three cat household, all rescued and, of course with health and/or emotional issues that normally come along with all rescued cats. Our mommy worries a great deal about our wellbeing! 

She tried all novel things including alternative medicine. Well, she wanted more; she wanted to hear from us what we think, what do we like or dislike, etc. So, she booked a reading with an animal communicator. Just to see how dysfunctional humans are…. they call “talking” with an animal communicator….a reading! Phew! Anyway, this woman wasn’t any good but my mommy didn’t know. I did not like her so I shut up and didn’t say anything. She “made up” some stories and charged my mommy a big fee. Mommy was a bit confused so she asked a friend who gave her someone else’s name. Well, well, well…..this time….this animal communicator not only that she was the real thing…she was a real treat! Sweet and compassionate and very, very respectful. We clicked right away and I told her lots of things, things that no one else would know. Mommy was in shock but happy! Now she has a much better understanding of what we like or not, what do we need, etc. Daddy is still skeptical about the whole thing but hopefully….one day … he’ll believe in it too.
George, I like to hear your opinion; what do you think about all this!
Yours… very telepathically
Jasper

Dear Jasper, 

Telepathy? Maybe.  Extra sensory perception, or ESP - yes. We cats have an extra sense that humans lack - the sense of smell. Humans are blind and deaf to smell, poor creatures. However, there are special humans that can "read" us well. I don't quite know why but perhaps the why of it doesn't matter.
The trouble is that humans cannot tell the difference between humans who can read cats, and humans who can't but charge high prices anyway. I can smell a bad human from about 200 metres.
Can we distinguish good from bad cat experts? Of course we can. We can read our human pets without any difficulty whatsoever.  That's why we domesticated them in the first place! 
Yours
George.
PS. Celia thinks the money would be better spent on a properly qualified cat behaviourist - but she would say that! She's toiling through her master's degree on the topic.

The dog who saved a cat.

Dear George,

I’m not going to repeat my story as most of your blog followers know me by now but I want to introduce Hallie – the dog who saved me - she is such a goodhearted and beautiful girl. Around Christmas Hallie lost her “cat” who was her best friend. She suffered so much that her mommy (my mommy now too) had to come home with a cat who would befriend Hallie. When I arrived to my new home, Hallie was all too happy to see me but I wasn’t so sure.  I lived my life on the streets or in the pet food store until then. Of course I’ve seen dogs before but never lived with one. I was overweight and didn’t know how to play. Hallie and mommy taught me to play and have fun.  I lost the extra pounds soon and started having so much fun. Hallie even gifted me with her favorite couch – as you can see in the photo. The nickname of my new home is “harmony.” Everything and everybody is so nice, loving and lovely.

I know the saying that cats and dogs don’t get along but this is one example that actually we do. And Hallie is one smart and beautiful dog.

With gratitude

Bander

Dear Bander, 
Congratulations on your sensible relationship with Hallie. You are so obviously Top Cat. You have taken over her couch, as any self respecting cat would, and she is lying below you in a submissive posture. Quite right too. Cats should always look down on dogs.
I am so glad you have recovered the gift of play. Play is so important.  Dogs play in almost all circumstances but we cats can usually only play if we feel relaxed and happy enough. It comes of the fact that we are the more grown up than canines. Dogs are more likely to be permanently young at heart. Which is why they even look up to humans, can you believe it? Poor silly souls.
Happy endings are what I love most. So many of my friends like Tilly and Toby have gone through adversity and it is such a pleasure to read how they adopted a suitable human and achieved  happiness at last.
Yours
George
PS. Bad news.  Celia has decided to go North to the Shetland Islands to look at wild birds. She's not going to catch them, but just look. So she will not be available to type my blog next Saturday. I wish humans would not let us down like this.

Swimming in a lake or mousing in the forest wilderness?

Dear George,
No, it’s not what anybody would think looking at the photo attached! I’m not practicing a roll, nor am I doing yoga or meditate. I’m simply stunned (and speechless) by my mom’s somehow irrational behaviour! Last week she wanted to take us (me and my brother Rocky) to a lake for a mini-vacation! Who would take a cat to a lake?

Cats don’t swim; at least I don’t! But my mommy doesn’t either! She thinks she does but ….no-no, she’s not; I’ve seen her in the bathtub – she just stays in here doing nothing. I've never seen her swimming across the bathtub (which definitely is not the size of an Olympic pool)! So, what’s the point going to a lake? But, this was last week! This week she wants to go to a cottage up in the mountains but she doesn’t want to take us with her! Now figure out why! George, you won’t believe this! Because ….we shed! Is this for real? Doesn’t she know that cats love the forest? We love the endless hunting opportunities! What if a wild animal will attack her? We could protect her. And who cares if we shed in the forest? No one is going to choke on our hair. Who would be disturbed by a hairball or two in the wilderness? George, how do I tell her that she’s completely wrong? Even worse; she arranged with a cat sitter to come and stay with me and Rocky. But, I don’t want any cat sitter – I want to go with mommy!

Too stunned by my human to say any more!
Stanley

Dear Stanley,
Human "reasoning", so-called, is a mystery. Shedding? So what?  We have this wonderful ability to shed or grow hair according to seasonal temperature - unlike humans. They are stuck with the same hair (and not much of it) all year round.
Envy. That's what it is. Humans hate shedding because they can't do it themselves. 
What's a bit of cat hair between friends? I have an idea on how to revenge yourself on her. Rub furiously on her best clothes in the wardrobe or when she is wearing them. Leave fur on her pillow at night, on the kitchen surface, inside her handbag if possible.  Be creative and think of amusing places to leave it.
And barf up hairballs. Best place for these is on the floor just near her bed, exactly in the place she puts her bare feet first thing in the morning.
Will it change her mind about the forest? Not sure. But teasing humans in this way is always fun.
George

The difference between purring and…..snoring!

Dear George,

As an expert in human behaviour I’m certain you’ll be able to explain the difference between purring and snoring. Why cats purr but humans snore? I heard humans saying many times that our purrs calm them, make them feel happy! Well, I can’t say that humans snore have same effect on anybody. My mommy doesn’t snore but definitely she doesn’t purr either. I’m trying to teach her (click the link) but she simply doesn’t get it! The noises she makes make me laugh! How do I teach my human properly purring?

With loud purrs

Sophie

Dear Sophie,

What a great purr.  If anybody can teach a human to purr, it will be you. They will want to imitate you when they hear it.

I don't think it will work, however. Humans just can't make that noise. Lions can. Tigers can. Cats can. But poor humans cannot.  

Eat your heart out, you humans.

Yours

George.

PS. I am putting the video of you purring here, but the sound doesn't seem to work. Cats will have to imagine a HUGE purr.  If any cats know why the video is silent please tell me.  I don't have purrmission to upload it to YouTube and put a link.
 PPS. There will be no blog next Saturday. I shall be imprisoned in a cattery while my human enjoys herself. Must remember to bite cattery owner. 

Portrait of a Felix as a cat with eyes - in paper filigree.

Hi George
My female human decorates cards with her own unique designs which includes quilling designs and others mostly as a hobby, she does sell some at craft fairs and on line. She decided to quill me and give me EYES. She is quite pleased with her first attempt at a Pet Portrait and might take it up and see how it goes.

If I am in the mood for ear tickles and a game I don't like her going out and leaving me alone.  If I'm not in the mood and want to sleep she can stay out until I get hungry.

She thought you would like to see the picture of me with EYES.

Best Wishes

 Feely Felix

Dear Feely Felix,

Just to make a good comparison, I have added a photo taken of you all those years ago when you were at Wrexham Cats Protection, before you adopted your human, Janice.  This way the cats reading this blog can compare you with your quilled portrait. I must say I think it is a good likeness.
I have always said that a pet human should have a hobby. Not a full time one, but something that the pet can find to do after it has finished its duties towards its feline owner or owners. We don't want them to become too dependant on us for all amusement. 
It never fails to surprise me how intelligent these pets are. Janice is a bit of a treasure.
Yours
George