Why do my humans think they know best? They don't.

Dear George,
There is a rumour going around that rabbits like to get up early. I don't know how it started - probably by my distant country relatives who have to find their own food. They can dash about in the early hours as much as they like but I like my snooze time. I like a very slow awakening.
I ignore my family when they come downstairs and start their human chatter. "Good morning Harve." No, it's not good. It's early. "Where are you, Harve?" Where do you think I am at 7.30am? In bed! "Are you hiding, Harve?" No, I've left home. Go away.
And another thing, they're starting to persuade me to go outside for a run. I was picked up this morning and carried around the garden. "Look, Harve, a snowdrop!" So what? If a snowdrop wants to sit around in the cold garden, let it. "Look Harve, a birdie!" A birdie? Are they the things that have been eating my raisins all winter? Naturally, as soon as I was put down, I ran for home.
George, I am not a rabbit. I am a bun, a house bun. Which word don't they understand? How should I convince them I am simply a furry person with his own preferences in life?
Harvey the House Bunny, http://harvey-diaryofaninspirationalbunny.blogspot.com/

Dear Harvey,
I am not sure about house rabbits but I know that wild rabbits like to get up early - dawn, preferably. It is one of the many reasons why I wake up my humans at 6 to 6.30am. They are sluggish pets that would prefer to doze longer, particularly on a Sunday. But I like to get up, have my breakfast served to me, sit on my copy of The Times (while they are reading it) for a quick chat with them, and then out through the cat flap for early morning hunting.
Of course, waking times apart, you raise a valid point. Why do humans think we are all the same. We cats, house rabbits and even those poor deluded dogs, are all individuals. Some of us like to rise bright and early, while others like a very good lllllooooonnnggg zzzzzzzzzzzz. There's something odd about the human inability to realise that one cat is not necessarily like another cat, or one house bunny like another house bunny. As you say, we have our own individual preferences.
Mind you, I think this hardly applies to humans. As a lower form of life, the apes, as Wicky Wuudler calls them, they need a sensible routine. We cats and you house rabbits cannot just let them go their own way. We should aim to install proper waking times (to suit our needs), sensible eating (with our share from the table), and times when they leave us alone. It's important not to respond to their attention seeking, as any human trainer knows. Make them earn our attention by good behaviour. I think it is called a Learn to Earn programme in human training circles. It takes time for dumb animals like humans to learn but they will eventually get it.
Love George
PS. If anybody reads Japanese would they tell me if the posts that I have enabled are OK. The script looks beautiful for me and i hope they are all funny cat comments. But I can't be sure. They might all be ads for viagra for all I know - which is my ignorance of a beautiful and cultured language. Very very reluctantly, I have decided I dare not add comments which I do not understand just in case this blog is littered with obscenities (despite being run by a neutered cat). Please forgive me. English is welcome, though.

OSCAR SNUGGLES, KING OF TIDEWATER, August 25, 1994 – March 5, 2010

Oscar Snuggles, King of Tidewater, has died after a long and happy life. Readers of this blog will recall his interesting and thoughtful comments on the human-cat relationship. His full obituary, where messages of sympathy can be left, is on his family's blog: http://simpleandsouthern.blogspot.com/

Oscar Snuggles and Emmie Sweat Pea were two little kittens born out in the wild, but a loving, caring family had “adopted” their Mom, Mollie Moo Cat (she was white with gray markings that made her look like a cow). relationship.

Mollie had to check these people out thoroughly before she could trust her babies to them, but finally she decided they were good humans. So in late August 1994, Mollie brought both of her kittens and deposited them (on at a time) on the kitchen floor of this family she had decided to trust.

This was a perfect place; they put Mollie and her kittens in the bottom of the back hall linen closet. It was dark, quiet and safe. All three of these kitties etched their paw prints into this family’s heart. Mollie only survived about a year and she was killed out on the road. However, Sweat Pea and Oscar grew old with this family. Sweet Pea lived to be 12 years old and was lost the end of September, 2006, leaving Oscar Snuggles as the sole survivor of this little family that has been so loved by their humans.

Oscar Snuggles had recently been diagnosed with the beginning stages of kidney disease. The symptoms were there, but was being cared for with an adjusted diet and prescription meds. He had improved slightly. Friday morning he decided to cross the road and didn’t make. His family found him shortly after the ill-fated accident. This was his first attempt to explore outside his normal territory.

To say his family is heartbroken is an understatement. The tears are still flowing. He will be greatly missed. Oscar Snuggles, King of Tidewater will forever be this family’s little Buddy Cat. There will never be another kitty like him.

His family writes: "Oscar Snuggles was the best cat we have ever had. His nature was so sweet and gentle. Over the years we have had several wonderful cats, but Oscar is still at the top of the list. And always will be".

Vroom, vroom...

Dear George,

Yes! I know! I know! I hear you! I should be in a carrier while traveling! You are absolutely right! But I LOVE to ride a car! I didn’t know until we went to visit my

cousin Tzila. My mom was very much concerned about me being in a car for almost 6 hours and wanted to give me some pills to sleep. She was advised not to!

Instead she placed me in a carrier with toys and catnip and everything else, but once in the car I wanted out of that cage! I cried and cried until she let me out! And…to everybody’s surprise…..we discovered that I love to travel. I wished they had a small steering wheel just for me! I was SO ready for this….either driving or resting as you can see in the photos attached. George, even if you are not entertaining my idea of fun, I want your sincere opinion. Giving the fact that I love cars, I like speed, I love driving….do you think I should contact Ferrari or team-up with Schumaher?

Did you hear about other cats involved in Formula 1?

Love cruising

Thea

Dear Thea,
I am so impressed. In fact, I am dead envious. Most of us cats are absolutely terrified in the car and we just huddle in our cat boxes. I particularly like the way you have hung a cross to give you some protection. I am sure God takes special care of cats in cars, just like he notes the fall of a sparrow. I hope to see you on Top Gear, the UK motoring programme soon. I think you are a Ferrari girl at heart - that Italian style!
I am going to be a bit of a spoil sport, however, and tell you what happened to Fat Ada my predecessor - all the fault of my other caretaker, Ronnie. She was free in the car as he drove down a small Somerset lane. Unfortunately a particularly dizzy female driver coming in the opposite direction, scraped Ronnie's car. He lost his temper and leaped out of the car to give her a piece of his mind.
Ada leaped out too and disappeared into the hedge. Ronnie couldn't see her at all. But every five minutes or so he heard her give a plaintive and very frightened miaow. He tried burrowing into the hedge to look for her, knowing that Celia would never forgive him if he lost her altogether. No results except that bramble thorns tore at his bald patch. Then he tried calling her - even less of a result. Ada never came when called. She was almost semi-feral and took no notice of him and only a tiny bit of notice of Celia.
Finally down the road came an old couple with a Jack Russell terrier on a lead. "I'm looking for a cat" explained Ronnie. "Us'll sniff urn out," he said pointing the terrier in the direction of the hedge. And so it did. Ronnie burrowed back into the direction the terrier's nose had pointed, grabbed Ada who was (luckily) frozen immobile with fear, and put her back in the car.
Celia arrived two hours later and found both of them pick thorns out of their bodies. A narrow escape.
Love George
PS. Wonderful photos.

Why do I like paddling in water at the seaside?

Dear George.
My name is Rupert and I'm a grey tabby. I read with keen interest, Riley’s letter of February 4th, as I am faced with a similar situation.
As you can see, I just LOVE to swim. I’ve always been fascinated with water, playing in the sink and the bathtub too when my humans do their thing. But when my humans take me to the cottage, which is my favorite place in the whole world, I love to walk on the beach, and play in the lake. But, like Riley’s humans, my humans are also overprotective, and always insist that I wear my harness and leash. If I could only loose that thing so I could really get into this. It’s hard to dive down to catch bugs and critters when I’m tethered to the leash. I’m just trying to catch dinner to be more self-sufficient.
I know I shouldn't complain, as my humans do spoil me to death. And I also know that cats aren't supposed to like water. But I can't help it. My personality is more like a dog than a cat. I DO come whenever my humans call me. I DO run to the door to greet my humans when they come home, and I DO like my tummy scratched. I suppose I shold just be grateful that my humans don't make me wear a lifejacket.
Why do you suppose that I act more like a dog than a cat? Am I weird?
Rupert.

Dear Rupert
I wonder if your pleasure in swimming is inherited from a Turkish Van ancestor? Many of us cats who do not have a pedigree, nevertheless have pedigree blood. I personally am convinced that I have a Siamese ancestor or possibly that I am related to a black panther. I dream that perhaps Bagheera of the Jungle Stories by Kipling was my ancestress. I am a black panther at heart even if my stature is small.
Whatever your enjoyment of swimming, Rupert, do be careful not to let your humans take control. It is very important for all cats to uphold the dignity of our species. There may be moments of affection for your humans that make you feel like a dog. Fight them. It is natural to love your human pets, but important not to forget who is boss. You. Cats Rule. Humans are happier when they know their place - below the Alpha Cat of the household.
I like water too. As a kitten I jumped into the garden pond three ties - once by mistake, once just to see what would happen and a third time just for the hell of it. I am still fascinating by running taps, dirty puddle water, and things below the surface of the pond. SinceCelia fished me out with a net I am less keen on swimming in it. It is just too embarassing and demeaning to have to be rescued by a human.
I know of a cat that suffered from a severe back problem and was cured by swimming. Dinky, a ginger and white kitten was rescued by Cats Protection and bottle fed by his owner, Sam. His back legs went wobbly because of a benighn tumour on his spine. Sam nursed him back to health and helped him gain back muscle by swimming therapy. Now he is well enough to mouse.
Love George

Keep your humans indoor at night....

Dear George,
Reading Mustapha’s letter I thought that, indeed, keeping humans indoor at night was a pretty good idea. It could be an excellent time to further train them.
Even if I’m fairly young I know lots of tricks & things.
Last Saturday night I kept them indoor planning to start “the play time” training.
What a disaster! Horror! They did not understand that it was all about “MY playing time” not theirs! So, they invited few friends over and….they behaved like “party animals” until next morning! Do they have any brain? Any respect for me or my sister?
Look at me in this picture; at my young age is it normal to collapse on the stairs instead of sleeping in a bed? George, maybe keeping them indoor is not such a good idea after all! Maybe we should let them outside, free… so they can get in trouble!
By the way! Talking about pets; should I switch to a ferret from an inconsiderate human?
What do you think?
Exhausted
Cheetho

Dear Cheetho,
Humans are best kept in at night for their own safety. Single humans will otherwise spend the evening straying, roaming round looking for fights (if they are male), or sex, or their idea of a "good time." Some are drug users and, unlike us, don't stick to harmless recreational drugs like catnip. The younger ones seem willing to sniff anything. The older ones smoke stuff or drink a drug called alcohol. They behave very oddly as a result when they return. Keeping them indoors prevents some of this misbehaviour.
Humans being humans, poor dumb creatures, some of them will attempt to behave in the same way but in their own homes - just as yours did. I believe in punishment - but delayed punishment. I have tried turning up to the table at a suitable time, say 10pm, to get them to throw out their friends and come to bed. It never worked. Nowadays I just go to bed on my own (haven't yet learned how to switch on the electric blanket, alas,) and wait for them. That is the moment for punishment. I leap up and down all over the bed at regular intervals through the night, waking them up. They usually have what I call "sore heads" and they call "hangovers" and this drug reaction gets worst in the morning. Loud purring near their ears or just sitting on their faces is a really good punishment. They hate it.
One solution would be to make humans into indoor-only pets. I gather that the Association of Human Veterinary Practitioners, an association of feline experts, has suggested that the answer to human problems is just to keep them in all day. They claim that there are elderly humans that live this way and are perfectly happy to do so. But I think it is going too far. Humans need to be able to get out and do species specific behaviour, such as choosing the right kind of cat food for us.
I don't think I would switch to ferrets, if I was you. They are slithery sort of creatures and give a mean bite. Humans, though inconsiderate and with poor cognition, are still the best pets if they are proprer socialised at a young age, and given plenty of punishment training.

Love George