How to wake up your human

 

Chest kneading

Humans are lazy animals. Every now and again, they refuse to wake up on what they call "Sunday." (And, no, I don't know what that means.)

 It is necessary to wake them. Here are some methods contributed by various cats who have refined their individual technique.

• Heavy kneading on the human chest.
• The flying pounce.
• The loud purr in ear.
• The gentle ear nip.
• Walking up and down the body.
  
• Loud mewing.
• Jumping on and off the bed.
• Nipping toes protruding from the duvet.
• Face to face rubbing, with or without purr.
• Backing the butt close to the human nose.... yes, that works!
• Bringing a dead rat on to the bed.
  
  
  
  

But the ultimate wake up call is a living rat on pillow. That always works. And it works fast.