Friday, August 15, 2014

The feline path to serenity. May all your humans get fat.

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Dear George,

Looking at my photo…you may think I’m meditating but, actually I’m praying!

I’m praying to God! Why? Because that’s what one does when in disappear.

Lately I have been criticized for being too fat, that I’m eating way too much or too fast or that I’m eating like it’s “no tomorrow”. Well, who can tell if there is going to be a “tomorrow”? Don’t they say “live in the moment”? That’s exactly what I’m trying to do

and I’m being chastised for it?  So, I pray to God that if He can’t make me skinny….then, make all my friends (including my humans) fat! George, don’t you think this is the right thing to do? Let them put on some pounds and see how hard is to lose them.

Yours in God’s grace

Lenny

Dear Lenny,
Humans underestimate the superior spirituality of us cats.  Only a very few of them - Florence Nightingale was one - realise that by imitating a cat, humans can find their path to inner peace. 
Here are some of the inspirational characteristics of us cats. We live in the moment. We do not obsess about the past: we rescue cats move on. We do not become emotionally dependent upon anybody or anything. We understand serenity and we know peace. We also intuitively know how to handle things that baffle humans - rats, for instance. When we are happy, we play like kittens.
Here are some of the things we don't do. We don't rush around getting and spending. We don't care about or for money. We don't drink alcohol and the only drugs we use is catnip, which we use in natural moderation. We don't fuss about weight. We live our lives with a kind of natural modesty. 
I hope your prayers are answered and that all your humans become fat.
Love George.

4 comments:

  1. Excellent idea Lenny! Right on! Why should I cut down on treats when my mom can gain 100lbs and shut up!
    Love
    Minnie

    ReplyDelete
  2. My friend, what do you do when your mommy doesn't gain weight no matter how much she eats?
    And....she is the problem in our house - she's obsessed with the "looks" and being skinny. She even put the dog on a diet! I solved my problem by eating the prey I hunt ..."au naturel" in the ravine. She doesn't come there; so I enjoy my meals in peace :-)
    Diego

    ReplyDelete
  3. Diego, I'm jealous of both you and your mommy (for different reasons (obviously)
    Shumba

    PS. Lenny, you look sooooo cute!

    ReplyDelete
  4. George, my dear friend ....you are losing it and I bet it's only Celia's fault. Please don't let her brainwash you; don't let her put her mere words/thoughts into your great mind....or, else,...you have to retrain ...to "unbrainwash" yourself!
    What did you mean...by "we live our lives with a kind of natural modesty"? You sound like my mummy "love all sentient beings...don't eat that poor mouse"! Phew! George, my dear, I'm certain we live our lives with a kind of natural majesty" Grandiose!
    Love & hugs
    Fluffy

    PS. Lenny, yes! may God answer your prayers and make all humans fat and all cats fit :-)
    We'll have such a good laugh!

    ReplyDelete

Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, www.celiahaddon.com This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online VetTechprogramms.org