Sunday, August 28, 2011

Cars - friend or foe for us cats?

Dear George,
My name is Ernie and I live in an Oxfordshire village which has lots and lots of cars parked outside during the evening and night. The odd thing is that most of these - two thirds, I would say - are absent during the day. Where do they go? Why don't they stay still? It is one of the mysteries of my life. Like a flock of birds, they leave shortly after dawn and then come back to roost in my village streets. What do you make of cars, George?

Dear Ernie,
Cars are very odd indeed. They have their uses. I enjoy sniffing the wheels which often have interesting smells left by other cats spraying there or by dogs which cock their leg against the rubber. There are also delicious whiffs of dead mammals that have been run over - rabbits, hares and mice. This time of year in Oxfordshire there are additional crushed feathers and flesh of pheasants that are let out to be shot by humans. These domestic birds are hopelessly lost in the countryside, like hens let out of a coop. I could almost feel sorry for them if they didn't taste so good.
As well as providing interesting smells, cars are useful refuges for cats. At dusk, when they are quiet and still, we can shelter from the rain. Or use them as a safety area, if there are large dogs in the vicinity. In cold weather, when they have flocked back to their roost, they are often still warm from the movement. Sitting on the engine can warm up a chilly cat.
When they are not asleep, however, they are cat killing monsters. Their flashing eyes at night paralyse us so that we don't know how to cross the road. If we make a run for it, blinded by them, we often end up dead or severely injured.
Humans seem addicted to them. So we are stuck with them, I suppose. Humans don't realise how dangerous they are to cats.

PS. Please look at the artwork by Harvey the inspirational House Rabbit. Eye opening talent. If comments are slow on getting on this is because my secretary is away and has put me in a cattery. The traitoress.


  1. Fluffy and CayenneAugust 28, 2011

    Ernie, stay away from cars! As far as you can, and we mean it! Advise all your feline friends to just do the same. Cars look nice (did you look at a Rolls or Bentley or Porche?) but ARE dangerous! They lure you (with their sleek lines) to buy them just to kill you after! We LOVE antique cars but they are no better - they can kill too! Where they go during the day? To find new victims! Better look at them from a window sill.
    Fluffy & Cayenne

  2. Fluffy and CayenneAugust 28, 2011

    Harvey, indeed, very inspirational art! We don't have a google account (what's google anyway?) so we couldn't post our comment on your blog, but YOU ARE A REAL TALENT! Our art is just mere copy of yours! We focus mainly on our living room rug!
    Fluffy & Cayenne

    PS. Hey, George, we'd like to see some photos Celia took yesterday....or was it just another excuse so she could get away? :-)))

  3. What gets me about cars lads is that people sit in them and disappear and then later they come back - where do they go I wonder? Especially when they open the bit at the back and take out bags and bags and bags of goodies all for us. We have a lot of the things where we live in a cull de sack (or at least that's what I'm told we live in)and it's my responsibility to wash the lights and tyres which I am well equipped to do by simply lifting my tail and turning the hose on, me and my brother keep getting told to be careful but we just do as we like, my brother especially likes to lie right in the middle of the road and sunbathe or get a dust bath, it keeps the humans on their toes but they do look a bit daft hanging around outside waiting to stop cars coming along from flattening my brother. From Walter Sparkle x

  4. I LOVE a car ride, traveling somewhere but otherwise I'm afraid of them. Never go to close to one - it smells bed!

  5. This is how I lost my beloved Oscar Snuggles. They are deadly.

  6. I think of them as magic flying boxes! They can fold people in and go somewhere and then they come back with even more people in, especially young ones. Have you ever seen how many can fit inside? But, I afraid of them and no fun to hunt them down the street.

  7. Trying to survive a harsh winter on the streets, I can appreciate a car that comes home to sleep and the engine is still warm all night!
    Otherwise, be aware! They can kill and they do.

  8. We aren't keen on cars. We sit under the cars belonging to our apes on our driveway, but no other cars. They give us a good vantage point to watch the world go by.

    All cats please beware of stationary cars, especially if you are older and your ears aren't so good anymore. We knew of a lovely old cat who got squashed because his owner didn't check under the car before driving off.

    Also beware of the demon antifreeze that apes put into their cars - it might taste sweet but it is deadly poison to us!

    Another reason to hate cars is that they sometimes mean a trip to the v-e-t yuck.

    Gerry & oliver

  9. PS: George we are so sorry you have been sent to prison whilst Celia whoops it up on holiday. What are you doing allowing her a holiday anyway? We could send you a tin of cat food with a large file inside if you like!

    Gerry & Oliver


Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online