Thursday, February 04, 2010

Snow for cats but no harnesses


Dear George,
It’s me Riley! And I LOVE snow! Everybody in my house thinks I’m nuts.
I don’t really see why I must be nuts if I love being outside in the snow.
My only problem is that my humans tend to worry too much about me and won’t let me outside on my own. I mean….each time I want to go outside …one of them has to put that stupid leash on me. WHY? I’M NOT A DOG! I don’t need to be walked! I don’t need or want to inspect my territory with a human bodyguard beside me!
Imagine summer time; they have a boat! What if I like water? Would they be scuba diving with me? Phew!
George, how can I tell them (or even better train them) to let me outside by myself?
How can I tell them to just leave me alone? They are always in my face!
Should I suggest them to get a little dog so they can keep busy?
Speechless
Riley

Dear Riley,
A dog would be a mistake. Nasty smelly snuffling creatures with the ridiculous habit of
obeying humans. As I said last week, no self respecting cat can truly trust a dog. Dogs sometimes even chase, catch and kill cats. Even a really loving family dog will get in the way of proper human training. It may keep them busy but we want humans with plenty of time to lavish on us. Don't even think about it.
Frankly the same goes for the idea of getting another cat. In theory it is nice to have company but most of us only like company if it is a related brother or sister. We can learn to share the house with and more or less get on with others, and just occasionally we become fond of them. But most of the time when we live with others, we are just acquaintances. Some of us hate all other cats. We are not willing to put up with what we don't like and on the whole
cats don't share.
I am in favour of the outdoor life. Try to make your needs known by the following - wistful staring out of windows accompanied by heart-rending mewing; sliding out of the door into freedom every time the human opens it; jumping out of any open windows. In hot weather windows get opened. Most humans are too stupid to remember to install cat-proof netting like www.cataire.co.uk
Leashes are for dumb dogs not for bright cats. You can probably lose that harness if you wriggle a bit. Most cats can (and do) wriggle out of one when they are truly frightened - just do it when you want to explore. I knew of a cat that escaped her harness on the Italian docks at Brindisi and was never seen again.
Snow is quite fun if you don't mind getting wet and cold. Wriggle free and whizz off into the nearest drift, Riley. That'll larn 'em.
Love George

12 comments:

  1. I hope my humans don't see this. I don't want them to get any ideas of puting me on a leash! That would be a disaster. That way I couldn't just disappear into the bushes and hide from them and just watch them fret when they start to look for me. That's part of the game, you know.

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  2. Find any window open in your house and use it :-)
    Fluffy

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  3. Putting a leash on a cat is like trying to harness the wind, cats are free spirits and to treat them like this is to demean and humiliate them. My two cats would gang up and claw open my jugular if I so much as showed them a lead, and rightly so. Cats are not dogs, bad enough that dogs are yanked along at their owners will but NEVER cats!

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  4. Forced control is no control. Most apes don't understand this principle. Not so long ago, apes shackled some of their own kind like this. They "owned" these poor shackled creatures and called them "slaves"

    We sent your secretary a poem George

    Whicky Wuudler

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  5. Riley, you ARE nuts! Enjoying walking in the snow?
    Nuts!Nuts!Nuts!
    Hugs
    Cayenne

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  6. Babz, I hear what are you saying....but sometimes it is better on a leash then risking your life in traffic! Or.....if it's "no leash" policy....then it's is an "indoor only" policy too.
    It is hard to judge if you do not know the circumstances :-)
    Minnie

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  7. Good! Enjoy your walk! I'm too old for any of this! I just want some quiet house, a nice meal and my time to snooze!
    Sebastian

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  8. Hey, Riley....you are my friend! I love snow too!
    I love to be outside no matter what!
    I'm lucky though that I live in more rural area...so I don't need a leash!
    When I'm getting too cold I "knock" on the door and...then I nap in one of the boys beds until next day :-)
    Diego

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  9. Riley,
    You do not advise your humans to get a dog under no circumstances! No leash? I don't know. If it's better for you....it could be okay!
    But absolutely NO DOG! You are the master of the house....they (your humans) are just your housekeepers - keep this in mind kid!
    Sir Winston

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  10. What's the big fuss about? Leash...no leash! Snow...no snow? Relax! We can make a movie out of this! Something like..."barefoot in the snow"
    Isn't that cool?
    Frederico

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  11. Even if I totally agree with Babz regarding putting a leash on a cat....I know how hard is trying to survive in a big city living on the streets. I did this for almost two years and ....sometimes I wished I had a leash and some humans to take care of me!
    Love
    Shumba

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  12. In order to keep a check on how many of my raisins are put out for the birds I need to be intrepid and pop outside now and again to count them. I don't mind snow on my paws for a very short time. We love the video on www.simonscat.com of his cat in the snow.
    We rabbits have a great sense of humour.
    Best to all,
    Harvey

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Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, www.celiahaddon.com This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online VetTechprogramms.org