Thursday, June 21, 2007

The female prisoner next door ... William writes

She did it again. Banged us up without mercy for several days. George, for whom I have little time, behaved a bit better this time. He seemed more resigned and spent less time involving me in unworkable silly escape plans that would have made my life in prison even worse than it was. I didn't have to bite Gill the Cattery once, because he didn't set me up to it like last time.
George spent most of his time prancing up and down striking attitudes to impress the white and black cat next door. She seemed pretty unimpressed, I thought. She was bigger - and fatter- than him. I think he found it difficult to accept that a female wasn't interested. Obviously we are all - me, George and her, neutered and therefore on the side lines of the sex war. But there is a frisson of sexuality none the less.
She seemed more impressed by me, I thought. Something in the way she would stretch up full length when she saw me. Some females fancy the older tom. We are calmer, more tolerant, less reactive. I let George strutt his adolescent stuff which included some very rude goggling. I concentrated on more sophisticated eye contact. I didn't stare. Staring is bad mannered as all cats (and a few knowledgeable humans) know. I just did a quick eye flash and then lowered them, as if to say "I am the sort of cat that might be friendly, if you played your cards right." I think we came to an understanding - distant but warm.
There was another neighbour cat. I didn't think much of him. He had a moustache like Hitler. But I must let George have his say.


  1. AnonymousJune 21, 2007

    Dear William
    Welcome back home!
    I am pleased to hear you didn't allow George to involve you in more escape plans and also met a
    lady cat who gave you a flash of her white tummy. Did you give her a flash too?
    Glad to hear you are both home now, make sure you let Celia know who is the boss.
    Elegant Emma

  2. AnonymousJune 21, 2007

    Oh no! not again! in prison! Well, I'm glad you are home again to roam and nap as you please. I'm having a relaxing summer. My human has allowed me to venture up to the guest bedroom for my day naps. I LOVE IT! She even took my photo and plastered it all over her blog! I can't believe her lack of regards my privacy.

    Oscar, King of Tidewater
    Jonesboro, GA USA

  3. AnonymousJune 23, 2007

    I'm sorry to hear of your travails at the cattery, William. I too will be banged up in mid July while my thankless people go on holiday. I shall deal with it the only way I know how: refusing to come out of my chalet, hissing at passers-by and looking for opportunities to bite.

    My fluffy black neighbour swears by hunger strike in the nick (visible weight loss makes the humans feel guilty, apparently). Sad to say, this seems like one step too far for me. I can't envisage life without my two squares a day.


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