Saturday, June 13, 2020

Humans are getting hairier... and worse dressed

Jasmine has kept her fur beautifully groomed.
Are humans losing it? They seem to be getting hairier! Or is it just that they cannot groom themselves?
Look around at the humans you know, the ones that are now staying indoors most of the time. The fur on their head is growing longer and seems to be changing colour too - grey and brown instead of blonde.
The men are trying to grow whiskers. Poor things can only manage stubby facial fur not proper long and beautiful whiskers.
Compare this to your own fur -- still delightfully untangled, unchanged in colour, beautifully and sensitively styled and groomed. By you. Strong and sensitive whiskers, each tapered at the end for extra finesse.
And their clothes, that they cover their bodies with because they can't grow proper fur, seem to be changing too. Many of them are staying in dressing gowns or pyjamas or night clothes all day.
I have tried to set a good example by rigorous and stylish grooming all over my body. Not forgetting those tricky bits on the belly and lower down.
Humans seem to be losing what little self respect they once had, and becoming unable to care for themselves.
What can we cats do about this?


  • For more on managing your human get my book here.

Saturday, June 06, 2020

Stand up for Cats in Rescue.

Fear and frustration in a rescue
It's time somebody stood up for cats in shelters. Big rescue organisations often treat cats like second hand kittisens. Dogs get all the attention. Cats are just an add on. Humans, purrlease do something.
What is the worst?
Well the worst is the smell and sound of the premises. The scent of dog wafts everywhere - on the hands and clothing of the staff, on the clothing of the would-be adopters, in the veterinary surgery, and in the offices of the manager
Nobody remembers that most of us cats are scared by dogs.
Then there is the constant sound of barking. We cats have the widest range of hearing of almost all animals. We can hear a mouse's footfall. But do shelter staff care? Do they even think of the constant stress of the constant noise of barking?
Nobody remembers the noise of dogs scares us.....
Purrlease, humans, do something.
Educate yourself and others about what we need and want.
Stand up for cats in Rescue!
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  • Read more on feline rights here.

Saturday, May 30, 2020

Going up in the world....

For once my human has done the decent thing. I am going up in the world.
Bored in lockdown, I finally purrsuaded her to spend some real money on proper cat furniture like the one in the photos. Now at last I will be able to be in the my rightful position of being able to look down on all the humans below. 
Admittedly she is too mean to include a cat house. She's just got a ledge/perch/sitting place.
I can't wait for it... a really huge one.
Of course, I will keep her in her place by refusing to use it, while she is around. Instead I shall inspect and enjoy the cardboard boxes in which the catipilla arrives....
Keep her waiting. For how long? One week? Two weeks? A month purrhaps? But I shall sneak down in the night when she is sleeping and try it out.
If you want your human get one, the website is www.catipilla.com



  • More on human management here. 

Saturday, May 23, 2020

Block that screen! Hit that keyboard! Murder the printer!

Humans urgently need our help to stay sane. They are focused so much on the screen that some of them are becoming addicted.
In this video Tommy shows you how to have fun while interrupting their obsessive gazing. You will notice that he doesn't just jump on the printer, he puts his paws on the keyboard, which cries out with an odd noise each time.
Do your duty during this crisis. Interrupt your human before its obsession with the screen overcomes it.
Stroking us, feeding us, and talking to us is so much more important than they realise. It brings them back to the real world and gives them important body contact.
Place yourself between the screen and your human whenever possible.  
 

  • For more tips on how to manage a human get this book here

Saturday, May 16, 2020

Beware despot cats.

This is my local despot cat, Alfie. I am terrified of him. He sits on my wall and glares menacingly at me. 
This is a dilemma when I do need human help. Humans can be very stupid about this problem. They don't understand that a feline stare is very intimidating. At first she thought Alfie was just being 'friendly.' A ridiculous idea.
Then other humans told her how Alfie fights all other cats, if he can get hold of them. At last she is being helpful. She hisses and shouts at him every time he appears. 
And since she has started doing that, at least he doesn't come into the garden. She also protects me by closing the cat flap at night, when he is on the prowl. It's a kind of time share.
Luckily, he is not a large cat but I don't want to get into fights with any other cat. So I usually just slink back into the house and feel miserable. The microchip cat flap means the house is safe from him.
Last evening I saw him being chased across the wall by a larger cat. It was a great moment.


  • For help in managing your human read this book here.
 

Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, www.celiahaddon.com This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online VetTechprogramms.org