Friday, July 28, 2023

Play is more than just play

This is natural play with a dead mouse

Play isn't just play. It's important for our feline mental health, especially if we are indoor cats. We need it. 

It exercises not just out bodies but also our minds when our humans play fishing rod games with us. We can stalk and pounce and bat the toy on the end as if we were hunting.

I hunt a little bit indoors anyway. I hunt flies on the window pane and any other kind of insects indoors. I pounce on spiders and butterflies when I get the chance. I even eat them occasionally.

This is the same play with a toy indoors

But that's not enough because my human has such a tidy apartment with so few insects in it. I need more. I love chasing toys on the kitchen floor and I absolutely adore fishing rod games. 

So purrlease play with me. It's the theme for International Cat Day which is coming up soon. Find out more https://icatcare.org/international-cat-day/

 

Saturday, July 22, 2023

Why do humans lie on litter?

Even kittens know what sand is for.

 Humans are so weird. This time of year they leave their homes to go and spend hours lying in the sun on nature's litter tray -- the sea shore. Miles and miles of hot sand, ideal for feline use, are full of humans just lying there doing nothing!

There they are, with only a few bits of artificial fur (clothing), on sand. Sand is what I love too - but for digging and pooing in. Any heap of builder's sand, any child's sand pit, makes the ideal feline toilet. 

One of the misunderstanding between us cats and humans is just this. They really get upset when we use the kid's sandpit! Or - the next best place - the newly raked dry seedbed.

But why, oh why would they want to just lie on sand. The sand gets in all their nooks and crannies, but they don't seem to mind that. They don't seem to understand that sand is for toileting.

Now I enjoy lying in the sun. I love doing that. The sun on my fur, a little ripple of breeze, the warmth relaxing my whole body. So, no wonder they enjoy the sun too.

But if there's a choice I use paving or grass to lie on: sand is for other purposes.

It can't be the texture that attracts them, because they usually put down a towel or a bed. Maybe they like the company. They seem to lie there crowded against one another...

As I said, humans are so weird.




Friday, July 14, 2023

What if your human dies....

Marnie hates all cats and all humans

"What are you going to do if your human dies? She's old and her head fur has gone grey!" 

That is what a feline friend said to me the other day.

It set me thinking. What am I going to do? I hadn't thought of it at all. I looked at my human - arthritic, elderly, wrinkled skin and possibly even the first signs of cognitive dysfunction. 

Well, what was I going to do? She might not last long enough.

Alfie would fight me
As a middle aged cat, I didn't fancy leaving home through the cat flap. At least not without a plan. The neighbours on the right would take me in for a little while but they are trying to sell their house. But if I don't find someone else, I might starve.


The neighbours on the left wouldn't, because Alfie their cat would fight me to the death and perhaps kill me. He HATES me and I am frightened of him.

A little up to the left lives Marnie (see the top photo). Marnie patrols the street - nips humans, likes Natcho, but terrifies most other cats. So no 43 is no good to me. 

Natcho rules
Most of the humans in my street already have cats. I don't think Pauline could take me in because ginger Natcho would be horrible to me. He is very bossy and takes her for walks

Chester, opposite, lives indoors only and is scared of other cats so that is another cat-loving home ruled out.

I am going to have to make a survival plan -or get my human to redo her will and mention me in it. If all else fails I shall have to go back to Sunshine Cat Rescue or Cats Protection.

Meow......I will have to do a feline will in the event of HER death.



Saturday, July 08, 2023

Face at the window

 

Pay attention, human passersby, as you go about your business outside. There's a feline face at the window watching you. In almost every town in every country.

Sometimes you do not notice us but we are watching your every move.

Those windows that you pass without looking in have someone looking out.  

You are under surveillance in a way that you do not understand.

We cats are watchers by nature. Sometimes we just sit, but more often than not, we sit and watch. We watch for movements and for moving targets.

You may be our focus.

We watch for prey and we watch for predators. And, when we can't or won't go out, windows allow us to do just this.

So, humans, furnish your windowsills with soft sitting places. 

So we can watch in comfort.






Saturday, July 01, 2023

Neuter: don't just feed.

 


I know that among humans are many who are kind enough to give food to those of us cats who are living rough. Thank you.

They don't realise that food is not enough. The best help for these cats is neutering and spaying. They will stay healthier and happier for this.

I was lucky enough to be neutered early and so, if I am unlucky enough to lose my home, I won't be exhausted by the search for sex and fights with other cats on my territory. I won't get the awful diseases spread by cat bites.

It's much the same for females. Spaying means that they will not be exhausted, sometimes even to death, by two or three litters of kittens a year.

Stray cats who have lost their home need to be rescued and trapped, neutered and returned to their territory - or found new territory. Not imprisoned in a home.

So please, human cat lovers, do it properly. Get in touch with your local cat shelter, like Cats Protection in the UK, and ask their advice how to proceed.


Friday, June 23, 2023

I identify as a cat.



I am a cat who identifies as a cat.

Humans are making a lot of fuss about their human kittens who may be beginning to identify as cats. No, they are not growing fur or a tail. So far no school is offering them human-sized litter trays. 

Perhaps they are playing at being cats. I know my human Celia did this when she was a child. And why not?

I take this trend as a complement to the feline species. These humans recognise our superiority and want a part of it. It is called the Furries movement in the USA.

When I first heard about it, I found it difficult to get my head around. But now I think it is rather touching that some humans want to dress up as being a cat.

Poor things, they can't grow fur, except in the wrong places. They have to wear furry costumes, false ears and attach tails to their backsides. They have none of the sheer beauty, grace and dignity of a cat. But they aspire to be in their minds, what they cannot be in their bodies.

I am pleased to be so up to date with this touching human trend. Purrhaps they will begin to understand us better.


  • This book might help them in their new feline life.


Saturday, June 17, 2023

Training? I don't think so....


 My human says she is thinking of "training" me. Like a dog. A horrible idea. Some dogs are trained by cruel punishments or even electric shocks.

I talked to my friend Toby who has been through this process. He says I am seeing it all wrong. It is an activity which trains humans to come up with better food.

First they offer you a treat, then they have a code word which follows. After a little while, once you recognise the code word, you know that a treat follows.

This is when you start training them. You do something that amuses them - sitting up on hind legs, or following a target - they use the code word and divvy up the goodies.

It takes a bit of time before they understand it fully. But after a while, they get the idea...

And you get free food just in return for some absurd behaviour.

Simple. They think they are training you but you are training them.

Friday, June 09, 2023

Ouch! Get off my tail!


 I have always felt sorry for humans. They are permanently disabled from birth because they are born without a tail. There is literally nothing there not even a stump.

They are dumb in their body language. They can't signal with their tail - tail-up for friendship: tail bristling up for anger: tail hanging loose for ordinary investigation.

They cannot balance well either. We use our tails for balancing on high places. They have nothing like it so if they are rock climbing they just have to rely on hands. There's nothing better than a tail swing to adjust the weight of your body so you don't fall.

Disabled from birth and compromised in body language. Poor dumb humans.....

So I keep good care of my tail. I make sure it doesn't get trapped in tight places.Oscar down the road left his in the crook of the french windows and a bit just tore off!  

He's luckier than Puddy in the picture who lost almost all his tail when he was sheltering under a car and it drove off. We can survive without a tail but it's like losing a beautiful body feature.

Friday, June 02, 2023

Cats and sun.. be careful.


 I love basking in the sunlight - whether it's on a windowsill or just outside in the flowerbeds of the garden. I love the heat and the feeling of well being and relaxation.

But we cats can get sunstroke just like humans do. We don't normally pant like dogs so if we start panting, or became lethargic, we need help from a vet.

The other danger is to our nose and ears. We who have white faces and ears can get sun burned. And in turn severe sun burn can lead to skin cancer.  

We need sunscreen that is suitable for pets. Not human sunscreen. We need a sunscreen specially for pets. All you need to know is here.

To reduce the risk of skin cancer, we need to be kept in when the sun is at its most fierce at noon. Our humans should take notice if our ears or nose seem to have scabs or unhealed wounds.

We need veterinary help for this. Sometimes it means losing the tip of our ears but this doesn't impair our quality of life. Indeed some people think we look cute, like this cat in Italy.

So, humans. Pay attention. Look after us in very hot weather.

Friday, May 26, 2023

Kittens can count.... puppies can''t.

 



Kittens can tell the difference between a small quantity and a large one, like human babies can. Indeed they can do this as well as adult cats.

Human "scientists" spend their time doing all kinds of activities that we cats find pointless and sometimes upsetting. One of their tests, acceptable in that it offered food, was to see if a kitten would choose a larger number of food items over a smaller number.

In order not to give any human clues to the kittens, these "scientists" wore dark glasses, masks to cover their nose and mouth and stared at the wall.

It makes you wonder what the kittens thought of this very odd human behaviour. However, like sensible little animals they got on the job they were given and chose the larger portion.

Did they count up the food pieces? No, why would a sensible feline, young or old, bother with this. They just looked and chose the larger amount of food.

Puppies cannot do this, showing yet again how the feline superiority over mere dogs.

 


  • Get your human to read this book...

Monday, May 22, 2023

The way cats live in Serbia

 


My human has come back with information about the lifestyle of a Serbian cat named Radosh. He has what humans (idiots that they are) call an "owner," Darko.

Radosh's life is completely different from mine. I am kept indoors all the time and fussed over by my human. Radosh leads an extraordinarily free life.

Indeed,Darko, unlike my human, does not interfere in Radosh's life very much, except to feed him when he turns up. 

Radosh has never had the operation that changed me into a home-loving cat! He has all his bits.

In winter Radosh disappears completely. Last summer he turned up again fat and healthy but the summer before he turned up looking thin and not very well. 

Where had he been? It remains a mystery.

Darko has not the slightest idea. 

Is Radosh like an unfaithful human husband, two-timing Darko with another human? Purrhaps.

In the mountains of the Balkan nation of Serbia, cats live differently, apparently, from the way we cats in the UK live now.

I think we have a better lifestyle but we do miss out on adventure, hunting and love.


Saturday, May 13, 2023

Black cats matter too.


There is something odd about humans and thier attitude towards colour. They don't seem to like the colour black - which is why beautiful black cats stay longer in rescue shelters.

This colour prejudice means that my fellow cats, who just happen to be black, are ignored or even passed over by would-be human adopters.

Let's be clear. Black cats are as beautiful and mysterious and affectionate as any other coloured cat. They deserve a loving home. So help them get it.

Don't let your human be part of the problem. Puursuade them to spread the word and become part of the solution.

Black cats matter!


  • My human is being boring and insisted on adding this pictures of "her" book. She just typed the manuscript when my paws got sore. All the worthwhile content is mine.


Saturday, May 06, 2023

No cats at the Coronation!

There are no cats at the British coronation. Not a whisker of one. 

 Larry the famous Downing St cat was not invited to Westminster Abbey. Neither was Palmerston of the Foreign Office invited out of retirement for the occasion.

Attlee, the new cat who has adopted the Speaker at the House of Commons will also be absent. His pet, Sir Lindsey Hoyle, however, will attend in his place.

Rumour has it that there is no place for any feline at Buckingham Palace for one good reason. Dogs will pledge allegiance any day even if it is in return for a biscuit. 

Cats won't. They don't do loyalty. Felines are republicans. They grovel to nobody. Canines are loyal royalists.

Remember the Civil War, when we cut off the head of Charles the First? 

Who's for doing it again, fellow felines?

Saturday, April 29, 2023

Graveyards are feline parks.


Thank the God of cats for cemeteries. For cats who live in urban areas, graveyards and cemeteries are parks - green spaces in a wilderness of brick and concrete. We can wander in these spaces without the fear of harassment from angry gardeners.

Of course, they are not entirely animal or wildlife sanctuaries, due to human obsessive neatness. They will mow the lawn down to the roots. They also persist in leaving trashy plastic flowers instead of the real thing. Poor ignorant beings.


But for cats, if not for other wildlife, there are trees and short grass and the flatter old tombstones make a nice resting place. I prefer the older tombs, myself, as there is less human disturbance in the older areas.

There is almost always a church nearby - a place where there is shelter from the rain if only in a porch. I myself have attended the occasional funeral, to the amazement and delight of the mourners.

My friend, Jake, used to haunt a church in the hope that a friendly human would adopt him. Finally, as he lay almost dying just outside the porch under the yew tree, a kindly lady picked him up and took him home.

For the graveyard - as some those humans whose tombs I use also believed -- was the start of a happier life.

 


  • She's written a book ....  She'd like me to keep putting this on the blog. But I tell her she can only have smaller text!! There are limits to her purrsistence desire for publicity.

Saturday, April 22, 2023

A purr gets more than a nip


 Do you want to get the most out of your human? Do you want food, or stroking, or an opened door? Think smart....

A purr may be more effective than a nip. A nip gets human attention immediately. Very effective in one way. But only in one way... And is is the right kind of attention?

A purr allied with rubbing against your human's legs might get attention just as well. And a different more rewarding kind of attention.

Humans are easily flattered. They respond to a show of affection even if it is not genuine. Try the following when you want something:

  • Purr. Purr loudly and often. Humans fall for this one almost every time.
  • Purr and croak. This is a purr that has a bit of a miaow in it which makes it more urgent. And louder. I recommend this when the human is not attending.
  • Miaow. Loudly but not too often. If you miaow too much, the human may stop attending.
  • Rub your body against legs. Always useful in the kitchen.
  • Rub the face against your human's face. Very useful for waking them up in the night.
  •  Paw poke without claws. This must be done gently and carefully. 
  •  Slow blink. This only works with sensitive humans who pay attention to your body language. The stupid human won't get this or notice it. And most humans are stupid.
Act: do not react. Always ask yourself - what is the best way to get what I want...

 


 

 


Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, www.celiahaddon.com This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online VetTechprogramms.org