Saturday, February 28, 2015

The perils of feline publicity... can I cope with stardom?

Dear George,
I am about to become a celebrity and I am very worried about my public image.  As the hero of Toby the Cross Eyed Stray, a biography of my adventures so far, I am not happy about some of the revelations in the book. At the time it was being written I trusted the writer; now I am feeling very let down, very disappointed, and very betrayed.
She says I am like Bradley Wiggins, the sports star. Fair enough. He's an attractive famous human and a ginger. Then she adds I am more "like a spotty teenager imitating Bradley Wiggins?" Is this fair? No. Can I help having acne under my chin? No.
There are other wounding comments about my liking for kitchen scraps and my ability to seek out food in unlikely places. She calls it cat burglar. I call it foraging.
Can I sue for libel? How can I cope with this unpleasant publicity.  I was thinking of lending my image to cat food companies - now I think this is out of the question. Who wants a cat with acne on their food label? She has contaminated my publicity.
Yours anxiously,
PS. I am possibly going to be in the tabloid press too - Daily Mail. Oh the angst of it all.....

Dear Toby,
Celebrity status, of whatever kind, should be embraced and enjoyed. So called "reality" TV shows with humans have made it clear that imperfections, flaws, even downright wickedness is no bar to making a living out of being famous. All publicity is good publicity.
You don't have to do anything. Just smirk if your photo is being taken. Glory in your "foraging" abilities. This is cat misery memoir.... make it work for you. I have coped with my feline agony aunt publicity by enjoying it.
I will volunteer to be your agent (10% of everything), if the offers come rolling in.
Yours hopefully,


  1. My dear Toby, I certainly hope you did not make the same mistake George made and used Celia's services as your secretary/writer. If you wonder you feel disappointed, let down and all she does to steal your ideas and put her name on books. That's what she did to George for years (but his "soft spot" in his heart for her is incurable). I must admit ...she can be really funny; I read all "her books" and I just love them all. Can't wait to read this one. As for will love it! Just make sure the paparazzi will take your "close-ups" not Celia's. As soon as she's showing her face make sure you cover hers with yours :-)))

    1. Fluffy, you are most perceptive. That is what happened..... she betrayed me.

  2. Adorable! I'm ginger too :-)
    I wish you much success with the book and lots of fame & glory!
    Where do I find the book?

    PS. Forget about "mean comments" made by humans....they all are "just humans" - a subspecies!

  3. CAT VictoriaFebruary 28, 2015

    A crossed eyed ginger! Better than George Clooney (who betrayed us getting married)!
    Toby, you look gorgeous and deserve the fame and publicity!
    Is the book out? I bookstores?
    CAT Victoria

  4. Carla, the tuxedo cat!February 28, 2015 might be right in your observations but, we have to give Celia credit as SHE LOVES CATS and, yes ....she's funny! She has the "savoir faire" of things(books). Since I quietly joined George's blog I had a chance to read some of her books! I love "One Hundred Ways for a Cat to train its human" - it's a classic! I love The Joy of Cats and Cats behaving badly as I love "Tilly, the ugliest cat in the shelter"! I know she wrote more but it's hard sometimes to find them where I live. Hope I'll find the Toby one!
    Carla, the tuxedo cat!

  5. Toby, acne under chin is "allergy to food" (my housekeeper is a vet). Check what source of protein you eat.
    Also, if you like kitchen scraps or human food make sure your humans eat healthy.
    Rotate the source of protein between lamb, venison and duck if possible.
    I'm looking forward to reading your book!

  6. Yous shall be marvelous!

    Rose the Kitten

  7. That looks like a great book. Please visit us for a giveaway of a cat in the hat mat and hat.

  8. Toby, I'm sure your book will be a success! the look at ...those big, wild crossed-eyes! Take George's offer but increase his commission to 20% to secured good advice in the future (always 80/20 works better) You might need to chip in a bit for Celia so she'll happily (and unconsciously) be your humble secretary too! By the way, there is nothing shameful about food foraging! Ethnographic records found a great deal of variation in the activity level of recent foragers as ....recent foraging groups moved camps on average 16 times per year! And, I'm talking humans here!

    PS. Hey, Fluffy...who are in love with? George or Toby? Until today....I could swear to Mighty Cat it was George!

    1. Diego, let's keep it a secret :-)))

  9. wow, you are doing some great work here simply loving it Lost and found

  10. Can I buy the book in Germany?
    Viele Kusse


Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online