Saturday, July 23, 2011

Why is Richard so mean to me?

Dear George,
I’m lost in confusion and I need your help. I’m a pure breed or so I was to
ld, apparently expensive too. I got to my new home (a while back) where I was welcomed by “hisses” from no other then Richard, self-named the Lionheart. At the beginning we lived in separate rooms but now we share the house; he is my brother (not my choice). We play a lot but he always wants to rule – he thinks he is the king! I think he is such a mardy! I’m a young, cute kitten and I think he should be nicer to me. When my human mommy is not around I’ve been called ET (whatever this means) or “ugly”. Richard is making fun of me by saying that I’m a “pure breed experiment gone wrong”
He says that he’s “the wild and handsome one”! This is cruel.
What should I do? Should I tell mommy?


Dear Luna,
I blame your humans.... they probably thought Richard would like the company. Humans are disgustingly and undiscriminatingly social. They eat together and hang out together all the time. It's quite horrifying to see them in a sort of pack. Irresponsible socialising is their thing. And they think we cats are like them.
Well, we are not. We don't hang out in packs. We might hang out with another cat if we had met in kittenhood but, even if you think Richard is your brother, it is unlikely. Where is your hair? Besides, if we cats are allowed to mate with whom we choose, a litter of kittens can have several fathers. (Humans reading this should remember the survey which suggested one in five children was not fathered by the man who thought they were his! So no sneers about promiscuity, please).
Sometimes we do learn to be friends with other cats: sometimes we just remain aquaintances. Richard was quite rightly upset when a small intruder, you, turned up in his territory. Luckily your humans are not as dumb as most of their species and they introduced you the right way. Richard will eventually calm down (as long as the humans don't punish him) and you will work out a relationship which allows you both to live in the same house. Have patience. Be confident in the feline ability to adapt to most things.
Rolling on your back is a very good idea. It will show Richard that you are not going to pounce on him. And, if things got really bad, you have all four paws with claws to fight him off.


  1. George is right, apes bung we cats together like they are creating some sort of feline tombola. Poor Luna, you must work your charms on Richard, he's probably quite spooked by suddenly having a new friend. If he gets a bit rough, make sure you squeal your head off. Ask your apes to give you some high up places where you can chill in peace too. Richard, do not be rude to Luna plz, some apes have been really rude about me because I look a bit different, I am happy to spray pee up their legs, so little Luna, if Richard is rude to ya, pee on him. It works a treat.

    Gerry the scruffy lad.

  2. That is some good advice. We think if kitties can get to know each other slowly, they become friends most of the time. Some kitties just don't trust other kitties. We have many many sisters and brothers so our human watches how we get along all the time. It is very interesting.

  3. Fluffy and CayenneJuly 23, 2011

    Gerry, you scruffy lad, as hard as it is without Whicky...we are really happy you chose to continue his work of love & wisdom!
    Please give our love to Oliver and Ape Jane.
    Love & hugs :-)
    Fluffu & Cayenne

    PS. Luna, we think Richard is a mardy moo!
    Yes, pee on him to show him who runs the show!

  4. SebastianJuly 23, 2011

    Pee on him? Pee on her? Hey, kids what do you think you do? What kind of manners are these?
    WE MARK OUR TERRITORY not each other!
    Or this is generation X pee?

  5. FredericoJuly 24, 2011

    What's a mardy moo?

  6. Sir WinstonJuly 24, 2011

    Well, I have to admit that I flirted with the idea of having a red tabby younger brother but, after reading Luna's letter I have seconds thought! I think it's better to stick to my "untrainable" male housekeeper who manage to get back in the master bedroom each time I move him in the basement. He just won't get it.
    Sir Winston

  7. Ma cherie Luna, you look so fragile, so gentle!
    How can that wild beast be mean to you?
    Move to Paris darling - we'll take care of you!

  8. Luna, I bet you have sharp claws which you can always use, but try first being nice. George is right; probably Richard is not that happy and possibly scared that he's no longer mama's # 1 boy. Make it clear that you'll both share mommy and you both take on different aspects of her training. Ignore the youngsters - they won't be long in the house!

  9. Te chiero Luna, but Richard is right; who wants another cat in the house? Not me for sure!
    Now have to come to terms with each other.

  10. Luna, it's not impossible! I'm a rescue and "my brother" is blue blood. We manage to get along; we have different interests and sometimes we fight....but generally speaking....we are ok.
    Sometimes is even funny to have company.

  11. Com'on Luna, that's what you're doing behind my back? Complaining about me, sis? I can't believe it. You are terrible young and don't realize yet what a "labour-saving device" I can be for you - I can eat for you, I can sleep for you, I can purr and get all the attention for you! See? you don't have to do anything at all. Isn't that great? Do I get a hug now?
    Richard, the Lionheart

  12. Oscar Snuggles and Sweet Pea were brother and sister (kittens of Mollie Moo Cat). As kittens they got along fine, but in adulthood Sweet Pea was less than thrilled with Oscar more often than not. This was especially true as they got older.


Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online