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Friday, February 24, 2012

Dear George,
My name is Cleo and I am nearly nineteen years old. I have just met your friend, Harvey at the vets and he told me about your advisory column. Our vet specialises only in cats and rabbits so we both get excellent care.
I have recently been very ill but am fine now although I need to have my blood pressure checked by my doctor quite regularly. My human mum is very kind and made some of her special chicken broth for me while I was recuperating but I still can't get used to being shut in my cat basket and taken away from my comfort zone. The only way I can show my disapproval is by shredding the newspaper in my cage while I wait for my appointment.
This spreads the paper all over the waiting room floor and everybody laughs. They don't seem to understand I am expressing my stress and I wondered if you might be able to think of some other way of getting my point over. Harvey said you might have some good ideas.

Yours anxiously,

Dear Cleo,
If shredding paper helps, keep shredding. Take no notice of human disapproval or laughter. This is an exceptionally ignorant species with a poor sense of humour and no common sense. Of course, you are stressed. Who wouldn't be?
I hate sitting in my cat carrier in the waiting room where there is not only the hateful smell of vets, but also a number of smelly noisy dogs, panting and barking. Luckily my human has a covered box for me so that although I can smell them I don't have to see them. Get your human to cover your cat carrier with a small blanket or similar while you wait in the waiting room. If possible she should put your carrier on a chair or on her lap. Higher feels safer for cats. She should sit as far away as possible from dogs or other cats. Or leave you in the car, and only bring you in when the vet calls you in.
We cats hate all vets. Would it make you feel better if you bit the vet? If so, feel free to do so. The only problem is that not all vets respond well. Some handle us roughly after that. And I haven't forgotten that awful TV programme in which a vet "nurse" (so called) hit a dog that bit him. I won't name the vet group concerned here, because of human libel laws but if any readers remember it, just avoid that practice.
Personally I just hunch down on the table and feel miserable in a vet's surgery. I comfort myself with thoughts of what I would like to do to the vet - clawing her, biting her, making her sit on a table and pummelling her, looking at her teeth and eyes.... If we could do to vets what they do to us, there would be no practising vets at all. Happy thought!
Yours cheerfully,
PS. I often go into my carrier for choice. Celia leaves it on the floor in the house and puts bits of cat food in it. This makes me feel quite relaxed about the carrier. Of course, this warm feeling doesn't transfer to the vet's surgery.


  1. Cleo, my sweet grandma, tell your human to buy you a proper carrier - ideally comfy and covered. What you have now looks like a messy cage! No wonder you feel like a trapped animal and that can be very stressfull and it will only add to your blood pressure problem. It seems that you have a loving human....I'm sure she'll respnd positive to your request. Tell her you don't want to feel like in Alcatraz!

  2. Dear Cleo, I'm not suggesting to switch vets but may be your human can kindly ask your vet to provide you with some privacy? Dr. Kneebone (my holistic vet) has a room for cats and another room for dogs :-)
    They handle everybody with much care and kindness. I get homeopathic remedies besides Nu-Cat, a multivitamin (very yummy).
    See if you can find a holistic vet in your area. Also, check this website: they have all homeopathic remedies for a lot of conditions and they also have Anxietrex - pet anxiety formula. That might help. Wishing you and your human many happy years together.

  3. Dear Cleo, all you need to do is to relax. If you are Harvey's friend I'm sure he'll work on your behalf to make sure to get everything you need to feel safe and calm. Adding George to the equation.....I can see you getting a better advice and a better & safer carrier.
    And, yes! homeopathic remedies work - I can see it on my sister.
    You don't need a homeopathic vet - any homeopath will do it. They can make you a formula for your condition. Let us know how are you doing.

  4. Oh dear! Indeed that carrier of yours looks like the cages at the shelter and only that thought can make your blood pressure go up! I'm sure your human will get you something more suitable.


Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online