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Saturday, January 30, 2016

I wish my mommy join the ….”no poo” (no shampoo) movement!

Dear George,
“No poo” which is short for “no shampoo” is the latest craze in North America getting more and more supporters every day! We’ve all seen humans going from one extreme to another in their search for happiness. So, for the time being, they decided that soap and shampoo are bad for them and stop using either. I heard some went as long as one year without shampooing their fur! Yak! Some are using some kind of oil and vinegar to clean themselves (guess these are fond of salad dressing) and some swear by “sun bathing”! But, NOT MY MOMMY George, not my mommy! Of course….she is at the other extreme taking showers twice a day and probably washing her hair as often too! Now, she wants to give me a bath every once in a while so I’ll shine! My skin horripilated at the idea! I shine anyway as I meticulously and rigorously groom myself!
George, PLEASE post some basic rules of cat hygiene so humans will understand we hate water and don’t need baths!
Yours in “no poo and water” for cats
Stanley

Dear Stanley,
What will humans think of next! Just because they cannot clean themselves (tongues too small and bodies too inflexible) they think we cannot. We can. We groom ourselves beautifully. We enjoy doing it. It soothes us into serenity. It is a very important part of our daily lives.
As an expert on humans, I understand (though I dislike) their habit of throwing themselves into water or pouring water on themselves. They cannot clean themselves properly so that is what they need to do to stay clean. We do not need baths. Never. 
Well, almost never. The only circumstances when cats need baths is if they get something dangerous on their coats - lily pollen for instance or paint or creosote. If that happens, humans should ring the vet (that loathesome but informed human), ask what to do and follow their instructions to the letter.
Just shampooing us for no good reason will irritate our skin and, if they use human shampoo, may even be dangerous.  
There are specialist shampoos for cats - used by those humans who put us into little cat cages and leave us for hours at cat shows. Cat shows are extremely boring for most of us though a few enjoy the human adoration. If you have that kind of human, you may well decide to rehome yourself. 
So no shampoo, please. Brushing us? Yes please. That is particularly useful for older cats who may not be able to reach all their body parts. And we enjoy it as much as we HATE baths.
Yours 
George

5 comments:

  1. I am a cat show cat, and training to be a therapy cat, so I have to have baths before the shows, and when I get certified and will be going to do therapy visits I will need a bath too. In fact, my show baths are more elaborate than my human's baths when she washes her hair! I have to say, it's not the most fun thing in the world, but I don't complain, or if I do, it's only a little. And I enjoy the benefits, i.e., the adoration I get from people at shows (yes, I am one of THOSE kitties!). I love my life, but I have to say, when my human pulls out the shampoo, combs and all that other stuff, I am a little envious of my two rescue cat roommates who stay home all the time! They've each had baths exactly once in their lives - Binga ran out onto a freshly tarred deck once, and there was the time that Boodie fell into a open vent (the grating was being painted) and her white paws turned black from gunk! Each time, they were marched off to the tub and scrubbed thoroughly! But that was the last of bathing for them.

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  2. Wow! Summer why don't you post a letter and photo on George's blog so we can see how a "cat show" cat looks like and learn more about your glamorous life?
    It will be soooo cool :-)
    Vegas

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  3. I rather be the King in my backyard than taking a bath!
    Diego

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  4. Carla, the tuxedo catJanuary 31, 2016

    Stanley, it looks like your mommy is showering herself to serenity :-)))
    You have to convince her you are already at peace and serene!
    Carla, the tuxedo cat

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  5. Humans should know that brushing our furs feels good and afterwards our furs feel soft and look shiny. I know some kitties don't like brushies, but they are a lot better than baths!!!!!

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Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, www.celiahaddon.com This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online VetTechprogramms.org