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Friday, July 20, 2012

Bats and cats and human hypocrisy

Dear George,
Have you ever caught a bat?   When a king pipistrelles started to alarm my human on Monday night by zooming around her bedroom, I naturally leaped to her rescue, thinking that those black wing bits might be quite tasty.  I finally got the pesky thing last night and was disappointed to find that it was quite unpalatable, so I left the evidence to show my human I’d tried and helped myself to a young rabbit instead.   My human was impressed, as she should have been, but two things about her reaction worry me.  She is muttering about worming tablets, but it is not long since her last visit to the vet for these stupid pills and I worry that I may become ill if she worms me too often.   And she seemed confused about which recycling bin to use for the dead bat.  Here in South Oxfordshire we have a wide choice – recyclables, land-fill or food waste are the most popular.  The latter seems to obvious choice to me.
And one last question.  Why was the bat indoors anyway?   The colony lives somewhere in the roof space and normally flies out over the garden without any confusion.   Were they trying to stay out of the rain? What do you advise?
Yours ever,

Dear Scaramouche,
Bats... mmmm. You are just one lucky cat, Scaramouche. I have to catch mice in the garden and bring them into the house, when I want an interesting game at 3 am in the morning. You've got a colony of bats waiting for you in the roof space somewhere. Hours of fun .... stalking them, climbing into the attic, poking your whiskers into various spaces in the rafters etc.
You could catch one and release it into your human's bedroom. If you are careful not to hurt  its wings, it will then zoom round the room.  That should give you and her hours of enjoyment. Wait for her shrieks of delight. Or just have fun of placing yourself on a wall and batting them as they come out in the twilight. Biff Baff. Another bat hits the dust.
I have never caught one but I thought they were just mice with wings. I'm surprised they don't taste good. I would have thought they were a nice crunchy meal.  I can see the wings would be too tough to eat, but I would have thought the plump little bodies were quite tasty.  Or perhaps because they eat insects, they taste vile - like shrews do. I catch shrews all the time but I never eat them.
Some humans, particularly naturalists (so called) get very upset by our tendency to catch bats. Bats have more friends among humans than ordinary mice or shrews. Not sure why. There are little groups of humans all over the country trying to save bats from other humans and from cats like you.
Humans are terribly hypocrites. Bats are endangered species because humans persecute them. Admittedly we take a few of them - but nothing like the numbers killed by humans using chemicals in their lofts or blocking entry into their rooftops. Even churches often try to kill them.
I envy you. I do.
PS. We look so alike we could almost be brothers. Humans reading this can get bat information at


  1. Puss-PussJuly 20, 2012

    Dear Scaramouche,

    It is with a sense of deep shame that I tell you I have never caught a bat. Or a rabbit. Oh, how I would love to! Doesn't matter if they taste nasty or not--it's the principle of the thing. It is What Cats Should Do. But I am a house cat with crippled paws. I do occasionally provide my human with an example of my killing prowess, though, which is native to such a fine beast as me. Once she was cowering from a centipede, and I stalked and dispatched it. Strangely, she did not want to eat the corpse I put in her shoe. Another time, her ridiculous puppy got between me and my litter box, and I clobbered him. The first time, she was condescending. The second, accusatory. Such strange reactions! What I was trying to tell her was, "Behold my prowess! It is only at my pleasure that you do not meet a similar fate at my paws! Also, feed me." But she missed the point completely. Sigh. My work continues. Regards, Puss-Puss.

  2. Bats have more friends among humans because of BATMAN (the movie). Silly! But what do you expect from humans :-)

    PS. Interesting enough....there is a CATWOMAN in the movie (who catches the Batman really bad) :-)
    Humans make me laugh to no end!

  3. Sir WinstonJuly 21, 2012

    Dear Lord! it looks like I missed a lot on the blog....but I was busy with the Jubilee and now the Games! Well, let's UK shine!
    George, who wrote the Tilly book? Was it you or was it Celia? I know she was stealing your ideas at times!
    I got the book and I enjoy reading it. It seems to be quite a touchy memoir - Celia's life and the cats involved in it!
    Oh! Scaramouche...I think you protect and spoil your human too much. Let that bat mess with her hair if she doesn't obey to your command! Well, I wasn't supposed to say that! Tonight I'm not a good example for a kitten as lovely as you are Scaramouche!
    Sir Winston

  4. Scaramouche, have you ever thought of offering short breaks where cats deprived of bats could sojourn a while and help you keep order in your bat colony. We could pay by bring you some frogs from our garden

    Luff from Oliver, Gerry & Mungo

  5. Oliver, Gerry....I miss you guys! Where were you? Is Mungo the new addittion to your family?
    I have to check your blog :-)
    Anyway, I'm glad you are back on George's blog

  6. Is Batman the same movie like Dark Knight? Now, I'm confused because of humans' limited imagination. Lately all movies look alike (violence, violence, violence)
    Better focus on hunting! Scaramouche, I bet your bat was confused by your human and couldn't find the right direction :-)

  7. Scaramouche, did your human heard of homeopathic remedies for parasites?
    I know a lot of humans don't believe or look into natural alternatives....but I really like them. They are non-invasive and if you get the wrong dose nothing happens - just it doesn't work. You have excellent homeopaths in UK. It doesn't have to be a vet homeopath, any homeopath would know how to prepare a medication for you! Tell you mummy that the "regular" alopat medicine for de-worming is all full of dangerous chemicals.

  8. And....what are we debating here, please? Hunting? Movies? Natural remedies?
    Scaramouche, don't waste precious hunting time on futile discussions! Simply say NO to de-worming (too often) and YES to hunting. Have fun! Enjoy the summer - so many butterflies to catch! My sister is always on a too serious side! She would lecture the world if given a chance! Now, gift your human with a mouse (dead or alive - your choice)!


Help for cats whose humans show behaviour problems.

This blog is devoted to the study of human behaviour. We cats, who live with this sometimes unpredictable and always feeble minded species, can benefit from seeing their behaviour in its proper scientific context. The study of feline dilemmas, training problems, and difficulties with humans, can only benefit all of us. All of us train our humans - to buy the right food, for instance, but many of us do not have knowledge of how to improve our training methods. The human species is obviously not as intelligent as the cat, but nevertheless can learn quite a lot - if properly managed. Topics of interest include the use of claw and order, purring as a human reward, rubbing your human up the right way, when to bite, spraying as a method of making our wishes known, ignoring the human, human harassment, human inattention and sheer human stupidity. I welcome your questions. Photos can be sent via my secretary's website, This blog has been chosen as one of the top 50 feline blogs by Online