I have a lot of fans in the old peoples home where I live. They all say I am very beautiful . I am, of course, not a vain individual, but pride myself on my cuteness. I am thinking of becoming a model .
Can you advise if this is at all energetic ? Like the human Ancients, I like to take things easy .
Yours with dignified cuteness
Jake xx
Dear Jake,
A career as a model is not too energetic, as long as you get the right photographer. Most human pets absolutely adore photographing us and much enjoyment can be had from making difficulties. Wait till they go off to find the camera and then scram. Wait till they focus, then turn your head away fast.
"The only cat that is easy to photograph," said my own human pet Celia, "is either fast asleep or dead." This remark struck me as being in very bad taste indeed. But then one doesn't expect good taste or dignity from a mere human.
So it is easy to be a model for your human. And enjoyable too. The pleasure of thwarting the inferior species is not to be underestimated.
However, there is a BIG problem with becoming a model to a professional photographer. You have to be skinny. Looking at your delightful form, I feel that there is a certain embonpoint, perhaps a quarter kilo, that would have to be lost.
So forget it, Jake. Cats never ever go in for slimming. Only sad humans do that.
Yours with disdain for the human condition
George
PS. Just bought Henri, le Chat Noir, the Existential Mewsings of an Angst-Filled Cat. Highly recommended
Jake you are already working hard being a good friend to the old apes where you live. This is probably quite hard work sometimes and we don't believe you should take up a second job.
ReplyDeleteStick you tongue out at any lens pointing at you, then ask for a pay rise.
Gerry & Mungo
Not worthy Jake! This was my dream for years...but it's not worth the effort! Be happy with the old apes as my friends are calling our human pets!
ReplyDeleteFluffy
Absolutely! Jake, give me your address! I'm Fredrico (named after the great Maestro)- we'll do a movie any time.
ReplyDeleteFreddy (for friends)
A model? What for? Starve yourself to be skinny? No teats? No bits and bites from leftovers? Are you nuts?
ReplyDeleteYou look gorgeous Jake! Wake up!
Minnie
Guys, maybe the criteria for being a model is different for cats! Jake looks fantastic and haven't I be in love with Tomasso ....I wouldn't have seconds thoughts.
ReplyDeleteGo for the glamour & fame.
CAT Victoria