Are cats really aggressive?

Dear George,

We are quite disturbed that one of our friends is not allowed to play outside because he was “aggressive” with one of his mom’s friends. To protest and make our mommy “do something” about this stupid situation we decided to wrack the house (as you can see in this photo – and we are allowed (sic)!).

Here is what happened; let’s call our friend “Mister” (not his real name).

Two days ago a friend of Mister’s mommy pay her a visit.

So….they were talking for a while when M’s mommy went to the kitchen to make a coffee. M was sitting quietly in the living room with his mom’s friend

We don’t know what happened there, we don’t know if she tried to pet him or do something, all we know is that M attacked her really bad. She couldn’t really defend herself since she had one leg in a cast. M was taken to a vet right away.

He was okay but scared since everybody was scramming at him.

We think that this is not right. We know that this friend of M’s mom has a cat. Could be her cat’s smell that drove M crazy? We are really worried about his welfare.

He is a really sweet, big, purring guy! Our “mommy” is working on his mom to calm her down and make her ask for some advice before jumping to conclusions.

We thought to ask for your help! What do you think it could trigger M’s reaction? Can you ask Celia to help, please (with typing, of course)?

Love & hugs

Fluffy & Cayenne

Dear Fluffy and Cayenne,

It may be that Mister saw something through the kitchen window and turned on the human in what is called redirected aggression (because he couldn't reach what was outside). More likely he was scared. Most aggressive cats are frightened cats. It may be that the human did something which terrified him (which she didn't realise) and he lashed out from fear. Could the plaster cast have hit him without the human realising it? If it was a big bite or a big scratch, it is likely to be fear. We can't be sure because it is not clear what happened.

Tell Mister's human not to jump to conclusions that he is an aggressive cat. He may just - at that moment - have been a very frightened cat. She should wait to see if Mister does this to anybody else. Keeping us cats indoors has its downside. If she is going to do this, she need to think how to give him more to do in the house - details for keeping indoor cats happy are on www.celiahaddon.com

One bite doesn't make an aggressive dog and one attack doesn't make an aggressive cat. Get Mister's human to read Celia's website on aggression and email her via that if necessary. We cats don't attack humans because we are "aggressive". We attack them because we are terrified, because we are frightened and want to make a human keep its distance, because we are starved of hunting opportunities (if we are indoor cats), or just occasionally because we are super confident cats that have learned to bite humans to get their attention.

Punishing us doesn't work. It makes us even more frightened and desperate. Take time to analyse what went wrong, and change things so that we cats can be our calm and loving selves. When the cat human relationship goes wrong, the human has to change the situation. We can't.

George

PS. I added on a photo of a cat looking aggressive. She was actually terrified.

Brushing my teeth ... I don't think so!

Dear George,
The other night I heard my humans talking about “preventive dental care”. As I was trying to understand their point, I heard them mentioning “brushing”, “toothpaste”, solution, etc. Girrr! I’m pretty sure they were talking about me and my sister since they brush their teeth regularly and sometimes I even witness this disgusting human habit! We (Fluffy & I) are given some treats for “teeth health” on regular basis, plus we eat some “fresh/raw” meat twice a week. Don’t you think this is enough? Just…..out of curiosity; what is your advice regarding dental care? What do you do (or what other cats do) to maintain healthy gums & teeth? Wishing all cats healthy smiles & healthy teeth☺ Hugs Cayenne

Dear Cayenne,
They tried a toothbrush on me -- three times. First the vet, then Celia, then Celia once more. A huge piece of plastic wand with bristles attached which they put right into my mouth, pulling back my gums as they did so. In order to reach the teeth, they said. On top of the bristles was an agreeable paste tasting of malt, but that didn't make up for the way my mouth was being misused by these humans.
With the vet, I merely cowered in my basket looking helpless and afraid. That often rouses the mother in Celia and is enough to stop her. It didn't. Having bought the expensive kit from the vet, she went home and tried it on me. I wriggled and wriggled and when we cats wriggle we can be very difficult to hold. She tried a third time and it was enough. I bit her. Strong measures were called for and they worked.
Her methods then changed for the better. For a time, she used to give me about two square inches of thick ox heart. Very very tasty. A really good human idea. I adored it. True, the blood was messy on the kitchen floor as I tackled the business of trying to chew and eat. Alas, she stopped this on the ground she had to buy a whole ox heart and keep it in the freeze in slices and, moreover, it was difficult to get offal from the butcher in the first place.
Now she has settled for dental dried food. Till recently it was Hills prescription dental diet but I seem to have got an allergy to this and developed diarrhoea each time she gave it. I love it but it doesn't now love me. So instead she has changed brands to Royal Canin non prescription which claims to get rid of something like 57% of the tartar. I don't eat it all the time - just get given a small proportion as a treat. It meets with my approval
But the ox heart was by far the best. Try it, Cayenne, if you can persuade your human. We need good teeth to bite our humans when they step out of line!
Purr and rubs
George
PS. The vet inspects my teeth at vaccination time - important because dental resorptive lesions, tooth rot, are hell for cats. We move towards the food bowl, try a little food, then back off with the pain of it.

How can I throw my human out of the Master Bedroom?

Dear George,
As you can see, I am King Winston of English descent and I was the king of the house…..until my housekeepers moved to a new house. As soon as we moved to this new place, my male housekeeper “took" away from me the Master Bedroom and Master King Size Bed! I know he is of English descent too, but I don’t think we are related (unless he is one of some unknown relative’s of mine off springs). Anyway, this is LES MAJESTE (and I hope he knows what that means)! George, William, Oscar…. I need all your help to kick him out of the Master Bedroom. (I want him down in the basement – that’s where he should be). My female human is very nice, a real lady and very kind. I don’t mind to share my king size bed with her. I know that if I start pushing inch by inch…..soon I’ll have the whole bed for me. But…what can I do about my male human? How can I move him fast in the basement?
In bewilderment Sir Winston

Dear Sir Winston,
It amazes me that your female human doesn't prefer you to a mere human in the bed. Such beautiful green eyes, elegant white spats and shirt front! Surely he's not as elegant as you are? OK, so I realise there are some things he can do which you can't (I presume like me you've been fixed). But can he purr? I bet he can't. It is outrageous that he thinks he has the right to sleep in your Master Bedroom. The man needs to be put in his place - well below Alpha cat, Sir Winston.
So how do you get him out of the Master Bedroom and into the basement? There is a choice - purr or claw. The purring method consisters of pretending to be nice -- too nice. Get right into his face at night - literally sleep over it. This nearly suffocates humans and they can bear very little of it. If he has a beaky sort of nose (inferior to your elegant one), it may be a tad uncomfortable. In that case simply sleep on the pillow right next to him and edge yourself so that you are sideways on but absolutely tight against his face. Not quite so suffocating, but pretty close.
As well as suffocating him, snore. Loudly. Walk up and down his body in the early hours of the morning. Pause merely to knead hard at any tender bits round the groin. This apparently loving gesture is extremely painful if aimed at the correct area and if the bedclothes are not too thick. It also looks affectionate in the eyes of the female human, so there is less likelihood of your getting booted outside the Master Bedroom yourself.
Incidentally, I assume you have put an end to hanky panky, or knookie, how's-your-father or bit-of-the-other (as we Brits call it in tabloid newspapers). Most of us cats sleep between our humans to remind them that we don't approve of it. Their juvenile humping and noise interferes with our sleep. We pet cats have turned to a graceful celibacy. They should do the same if they want to keep us happy.
The claw method of chucking a human out of bed is direct punishment. Use your male human as a scratching post. Bite his ears, or his nose - exquisitely painful. Crawl under the duvet and grab his toes or those other bits near the groin. That'll shift him fast. But it may also lead to human aggression. While there is no excuse whatsover for human cruelty to cats, humans can lose control which is why punishment in the bedroom has its risks. The unhealed wounded human is dangerous to be near! I'd go for the subtler purr method myself.
Best of luck,
George

I bite humans. I enjoy seeing them flinch. Should I stop?

Dear George,
I bite humans. Here I am stuck in a pen waiting for somebody to adopt me. Worse still, until recently I itched and itched and itched. I felt so bad I pulled out all the fur of my belly and backside. The anti-flea stuff they gave me made me so ill I thought I was going to have a fit. Then they changed my diet- after four months of itching - and my hair is beginning to grow back. You can just seem the remains of the bald bits if you look carefully at my tummy. I used to bite humans because I felt so itchy and awful. Now I just bite them anyway. They keep wanting to touch or pet me and I just want them to keep a respectful distance. Biting works well. I bit Celia four times in ten minutes. I wonder if I should stop. I don't much like the human race.
Zealand

Dear Zealand,
There's no ethical reason why you should stop nipping and biting humans. After all they are a different species and we cats don't owe them anything. Least of all you. Your humans gave up on you and just chucked you out into a rescue centre, where you are now. While you were itching all over, no wonder you bit. It must have been hell if you needed to pull out your own fur. No wonder you don't like humans.
Humans have this unhealthy desire to cuddle. And to touch. They must do it. They don't seem to realise that cats like you, who were probably given the wrong education as kittens, are frightened of being touched, or hugged, or cuddled or picked up. You want to be in a household where you get regular meals, somewhere nice to sleep, and you can get on with your own life - perhaps doing a bit of hunting in the garden. You are a no cuddles cat.
Celia can take it. She spent a year going into rescue centres and has been bitten by a large number and variety of cats -- frightened tabbies, neurotic pedigrees, Persians that have suffered from rough grooming, beautiful white princess pussycats terrified of the nearby noise of dogs, terrified gingers cowering in their beds, and cats like you that just bit any passing hand. The worst consisted of a bite plus a real clawing when half her hand swelled up. She doesn't enjoy it but she does understand that cats in rescue shelters are highly traumatised.
However, there is a reason for rethinking your biting policy. The more you bite, the more difficult it will be to find a home. Kittens find homes easily. Loving cuddly adult cats usually only stay about a few weeks in rescue. Somebody who wants a cat comes into the pen and picks them up and cuddles them and they purr.
But when somebody comes into the pen tries to pick up a cat and gets bitten, they often have to wait for months and months. Is there any chance you could try to be nice? Or just try not to bite till they take you home. Think about it. There are a few humans who don't mind being bitten but not many.
George