Dear George,I’m sure you’ll agree with me that we are born naturally gifted, much more so than humans. It takes a century for humans to produce a genius! It takes us about 67 days at most to produce one in a litter. That should tell humans something, right?
I know you are a gifted writer and other
cats are gifted hunters, acrobats or athletes.
I’m exceptionally gifted as a painter. I
took up painting but my human (just like yours, George) is not only sabotaging
me …she’s stealing my art too! Huh!
I must admit I have much fun dipping my paws in paint and then work the canvas!
I must admit I have much fun dipping my paws in paint and then work the canvas!
What does she do? She waits until I’m
asleep and recreates some portraits or still nature painted by me and signs the
painting with her own name. I tried few times to cover her signature with my unique
“paw-signature” but she must have a method to erase mine. Totally unfair. You
know what I’m talking about! So, George what are we going to do? Whatever
you’ll suggest I’ll follow! How would you stop Celia from stealing your work
and admitting that you are the author? How am I going to stop my human
pretending that she’s a great artist and give me credit for her success?
Totally yours,
CAT Victoria
Dear CAT Victoria,
Humans are terrible plagiarists. I have suffered too. Because I cannot use my paws to type, I am reliant on a human typist, Celia. Not only does she try to pass off this blog as my own, she also has claimed authorship for my best selling volume, One Hundred Ways for a Cat to Train its Human. I have a nephew, also called George, who is currently negotiating with an agent to publish a useful book about human management: he says he will only write it if his name is on the cover. We shall see what happens....
Could you purrsade your human to add a pawprint to her signature? Terence Cuneo, a successful painter of ceremonial occasions, always added a signature tiny mouse to his paintings. For more detail read here. In one of his painting a mouse was riding on the back of a cowboy in a stampede.
How much better would it be if she added just a pawprint. Either near her signature or somewhere semi-concealed on each painting? I know its not the same as your proper paw print without her name, but at least it's a start.
Yours
George
CAT Victoria
Dear CAT Victoria,
Humans are terrible plagiarists. I have suffered too. Because I cannot use my paws to type, I am reliant on a human typist, Celia. Not only does she try to pass off this blog as my own, she also has claimed authorship for my best selling volume, One Hundred Ways for a Cat to Train its Human. I have a nephew, also called George, who is currently negotiating with an agent to publish a useful book about human management: he says he will only write it if his name is on the cover. We shall see what happens....
Could you purrsade your human to add a pawprint to her signature? Terence Cuneo, a successful painter of ceremonial occasions, always added a signature tiny mouse to his paintings. For more detail read here. In one of his painting a mouse was riding on the back of a cowboy in a stampede. How much better would it be if she added just a pawprint. Either near her signature or somewhere semi-concealed on each painting? I know its not the same as your proper paw print without her name, but at least it's a start.
Yours
George
Oh! George, you made my day! An excellent idea, indeed! I'll see how I can work my "paw" into the paintings to stay there! Love it :-)
ReplyDeleteCV
George, I came to learn from stories and letters left by my predecessors that your "not so humble secretary" (Celia) could be very sneaky at times, not living up to her duties and, yes, stealing your writings! I want to alert you to the fact that she might be up to something sneakier than ever! I've seen my mummy reading a book "100 ways to be as happy as your dog" signed by no other than Celia Haddon! Do you know about this book? Is this yours as well? Did you start liking dogs? What the meow is happening?
ReplyDeleteChico
I'm a good sleeper! Super gifted! MOL
ReplyDeleteLache
I think it was George who wrote the book! He is well aware that humans are often making a mistake by bringing home a dog without asking our permission first! However, we quickly turn that dog into our "happy", obedient servant ...just like its human master! I think the message of the book is "humans stop copycat us, the cats; be as happy as your dog in serving us"!
ReplyDeleteCarla, the tuxedo cat
Honestly, I think George should post a letter clarifying the mystery with this latest book :-)
ReplyDeletePuf
Whatever ...the case I'm going to buy the book! I live with a big dog named Jake!
ReplyDeleteIs this book available everywhere or just in UK?
Whiskers